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Lesbians. Why not men?

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Is it a love of the female form, or a repulsion of masculinity(or possibly bad experiences with men in the past)?(feel free to shoot me down here, I'm here to learn.)
I can very much appreciate a beautiful body in either sex, but when I think of being intimate with a beautiful body, only the female body turns me on. For me, it is not a repulsion at all...the penis just doesn't do it for me.
I can’t answer this question as a Lesbian but as a bi-sexual yes I love the female form.

I’m not repulsed by masculinity as I love and appreciate that as well.

I’ve had bad experiences with men and women, with men the bad experiences have mostly been physical, with women they have been more psychological.

I wouldn’t judge the male or female gender on personal/individual experiences and it has no bearing on my sexual preferences, that’s just the way I was born and from one day to the next I’m attracted to one, the other or both depending on who, where, when and circumstances.

Have you asked the same question in reverse to gay men?

Do you find gay women a threat to your masculinity, if so why?
DNA. smile

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.

I don't think you can generalize about attitudes like that. I think lesbians prefer to go with women for physical, social and spiritual reasons, not because they actively dislike men.

As a bisexual girl, I have nothing against men. I just think women are a million times better company and they're just sexier, that's all. I would still go with a guy if he was ripped like fuck and cute/handsome. That's if my present circumstances were different obviously.

A First Class Service Ch.5

A steamy lesbian three way

Interesting question. I do have to say though that while SOME Lesbians don't "hate" men.... a damn good many DO. They are openly hostile to men, and more so masculine ones. It almost becomes a competition to see who has the bigger cock, and chip on their shoulders. In fact, I have seen some of that even here on the forums and commented on it at least once. But no, not ALL are that way... thankfully. But with gay men, that is seldom to EVER the case in reverse. I find that kind of interesting.


But with that said, I don't think there is any one set answer as to why any group is attracted to any other group. I do think however, that gay people (male or female) are attracted to people for the exact same reasons straight people are. Chances are if you asked YOURSELF why you are attracted to women/men, they would reply... EXACTLY!
Women are just prettier...

But I prefer men.. ^-^
I am Bisexual, not a Lesbian. I think being a lesbian, like being a Gay male is not a choice. Like Sprite said, its in your DNA. Now I do believe that some women may choose to be exclusively with women but they arent necessarily Lesbians. And there can be many reasons for that.

I am in a relationship with a woman but I love sex with men too and we both have sex with men from time to time. But due to coming from a very abusive (physically and mentally) marriage, and then having some really bad experiences with men after my divorce, I can never fully trust a man again to be in a committed relationship with one. I know there are plenty of really good men out there who would never dream of doing anything like I have been through, but its a risk Im just not willing to take.
having a lesbian sister...i think you are a bit confused...it is something they are born with..

they dont choose their lifestyle....wanting men and women is bisexuality...that is a choice as you love the act...not just a certain sex

a lesbian only wants women... that is like asking homosexual men why men...for that is what and WHO they are

not a choice not like huh i am going to be a lesbian today and tomorrow and i think i will go back to men

and everyone is different...

having had some loser kid accuse my daughter of being one by the WAY she dresses..i am super sensitive about this kind of question right now

there is no pat answer style or reason why you are gay

it is like breathing..you just..do

and i think that being abused by a man or woman might put you off sex for a while but never change you into a lesbian or a homosexual man

to me that is saying that again THEY choose TO be gay which they dont

you are born who and what you are...
Quote by silverfox55
Is it a love of the female form, or a repulsion of masculinity(or possibly bad experiences with men in the past)?(feel free to shoot me down here, I'm here to learn.)


I'm not lesbian, but I have to answer, or at least attempt because I dont think it matters my sexual preference either way. To me, asking that, is like asking anyone why they like anyone or anything. If I assume you're straight, (I have not checked sorry) that would be like me asking why you like women, it's just what you like. Why would one have to analyse it? I think in this day and age, these questions are archaic. People like who they like, what odds of the gender, and the reason?
thank you crazy!!!! exactly what i was trying to get across i dont know why but this question really offended..me
Quote by blazestcyr
thank you crazy!!!! exactly what i was trying to get across i dont know why but this question really offended..me




Its because there are still so many Neanderthals who believe it is a choice, or being Gay or Lesbian makes you a deviant. And that they are the man to set women straight!! Unfortunatley, some archaic beliefs will always be!!
Quote by silverfox55
Is it a love of the female form, or a repulsion of masculinity(or possibly bad experiences with men in the past)?(feel free to shoot me down here, I'm here to learn.)


I think that a large part of the reason many bi-women don't date men is that most are complete jerks. Now it probably doesn't help that many women find the 'complete bastard' alpha male type attractive.

What I find rather more puzzling is why any women find men attractive or want to put up with them. I find the female form far more attractive.
Quote by ByronLord


I think that a large part of the reason many bi-women don't date men is that most are complete jerks. Now it probably doesn't help that many women find the 'complete bastard' alpha male type attractive.

What I find rather more puzzling is why any women find men attractive or want to put up with them. I find the female form far more attractive.


I guess there really is something to said for an Oxford Education!! LOL
can i just say how much i love nikki and byronlord..lmao...they rock!!!
I will stat by saying I am a lesbian and as others have said, it was never a choice I made. The truth is that when I was younger if I had been given a choice I would have been straight. Unless you have been through it, you could never understand the hassles, embarrassment, ridicule, and chiding remarks you get from people who call you weird and so much worse. I felt repulsed at myself for being "that lez" and when I was much younger I tried having sex with a couple of guys, worse mistake, it was a disaster. Now I accept who I am and so do the people that really matter, my family and friends.

I just want to respond to JohnC on his response. Not all lesbians are hostile to men but I do know some are. As for me, I have nothing against men and some I actually love. I have four brothers and a father that were born male and I love them to death. Also, even on Lush, some of my first friends were guys and most are still my friends. You also said that some lesbians seem to have a chip on their shoulders but seldom see that with gay men. That may be because most straight women do not message gay men and say " one night with me and I'll cure you of wanting a man" or other things like that. Men do that to lesbians, especially here on Lush. Treat me like a Princess, I'll treat you like a Prince, treat me like a bitch and I'll show you one.
Quote by kinkygirl


I just want to respond to JohnC on his response. Not all lesbians are hostile to men but I do know some are. As for me, I have nothing against men and some I actually love. I have four brothers and a father that were born male and I love them to death. Also, even on Lush, some of my first friends were guys and most are still my friends. You also said that some lesbians seem to have a chip on their shoulders but seldom see that with gay men. That may be because most straight women do not message gay men and say " one night with me and I'll cure you of wanting a man" or other things like that. Men do that to lesbians, especially here on Lush. Treat me like a Princess, I'll treat you like a Prince, treat me like a bitch and I'll show you one.

Thanks for the response.

I fully understand what you were saying. And I appreciate it. But I can say that many Lesbian women send similar things to straight women here on Lush (and I am sure they say the same in the real world as well), so I don't buy that as an excuse to have a chip on the shoulder. In fact I have been told that the Lesbian women here seem to think it is some kind of challenge to "get the straight woman". Now granted, I am sure that is not the case with ALL of the Lesbian woman here..... but... just showing that this type of behavior is not exclusive to straight men toward Lesbian women.

And as such, I don't buy it as a reason to be pissy and antagonistic to men in general. I don't buy it as the reason or excuse. We all run into jerks (both sexes), but most of us don't take that out on the rest of that group. And if I can be honest, that put the fault back on the man/men. Kind of like if there is bad sex, it HAS to be the man. If there is a lack of communication it HAS to be the man. And on and on... when I am sure we both know that the truth is that men and women both can be the "problem".

But I guess I simply can't truly understand the animosity in any direction. I don't see the need for it, no matter what excuse is given. Less so a lack of general civility. Heck, you can be civil and polite to even those you DO hate. Right?
Oh Hell JohnC, don't you know that all lesbians are just guys pretending to be girls on Lush? What I'm told if I tell a guy I'm not interested. Anyone ever tell you that? Walk a mile in my shoes then condemn me. I always tell guys that the Forum is game and write anything they feel until they get make it personal.
I agree with Tami, I have not accepted girls as friends and that was the end but if I tell a man I don't want to be a friend I',m a lezzie slut or man hater. In real life I spend more time with men but on Lush, I prefer women, most men here are asses.
In my uneducated opinion, lesbianism is either DNA or trauma induced. Never did the reverse research for men but I fully belive being gay is DNA as well.
Quote by JohnC

In fact I have been told that the Lesbian women here seem to think it is some kind of challenge to "get the straight woman". Now granted, I am sure that is not the case with ALL of the Lesbian woman here..... but... just showing that this type of behavior is not exclusive to straight men toward Lesbian women.


It's common with gay guys enjoying the challenge of getting a straight guy too. I know several in real life that treat it as a bit of a fun sport. I'm always amused with how often they succeed too.

I don't think the thrill of the chase is exclusive to any gender or sexual orientation these days. We all love a challenge. Sometimes it's more often expressed with certain personality types.
Yes dd, and dont ever act as the dd for your daughter and her friend who is also.a lesbian and go into the one lgtb bar in town. That was frightening.
Quote by oldhound
Yes dd, and dont ever act as the dd for your daughter and her friend who is also.a lesbian and go into the one lgtb bar in town. That was frightening.


What?... Sorry - this went right over my head.

(I get the acronyms, I just didn't get the jist of it).
Menbisam now that's a thought...
Quote by JohnC

Thanks for the response.

I fully understand what you were saying. And I appreciate it. But I can say that many Lesbian women send similar things to straight women here on Lush (and I am sure they say the same in the real world as well), so I don't buy that as an excuse to have a chip on the shoulder. In fact I have been told that the Lesbian women here seem to think it is some kind of challenge to "get the straight woman". Now granted, I am sure that is not the case with ALL of the Lesbian woman here..... but... just showing that this type of behavior is not exclusive to straight men toward Lesbian women.


Some of the men here would like the lesbian girls to get the straight chick. It is part of our DNA, see 'Plan 23C':

1) Find girl who is into you, is she bi? if so go to step 3
2) Set up girl with lesbian girl to get her made bi
3) Get now bi GF to find another GF
4) Is new GF Bi? if not go back to 3
5) Get Bi GF and her Bi GF to do a MFF threesome
6) Gupping fishes time!

Needless to say if GF works this out and leaves at any point then go back to step 1. Alternatively, the guys would be quite happy to just watch.

More recreational than procreational, I am not at all sure why it is there. All I can say is that thank goodness I am a civilized cultured male who would never consider surrendering to such base instincts if there was anyone watching.
for many reasons in my life i trust only 2 men, they are my dad and my sweet brother. In my teenage i've been through a hell of a mess because of a guy that tried to me. But now my life is filled with happiness cuz of the woman i began to love besides my mom. She's my truly and only love, i'm not regreting the choice that changed me as a homosexual. As i believe fate or destiny (whatever you call it) always happens with us. Like sprite said it's what you brings to your life, it's in our veins. So being a lesbian isn't ignoring men, it's loving a another woman from deep in your heart. I like to say my wife is my whole life, i don't need a man cuz she's there for me, she loves me in every way in the whole world. So my family don't mind my marriage life with a woman either, cuz they know i'm happy to be with my sweetheart VERONICA. I love her with my all heart, she's my soul...
Not a Lesbian but here's my two cents for what it is worth

in my era (makes me sound so old) a girl thinking another girl looked hot was ok..having gone to school with alot of south pacific islanders, i soon learnt girl with girl was nothing to be ashamed of, not unusual as on the islands the men would go away for work and the women where alone.
not saying it was everywhere but it was accepted no a problem.. we never teased the open relationships that appeared in our school, it was accepted..Now not so much for the boys...unfortunately if a white boy liked a boy, he would come to school black and blue and didn't last long at the school
if he was an islander , he was a faáfafine...he was accepted straight away in his culture (faáfafine definition :girl in a mans body) and that worked through to us less ignorant white folk..
that was my first introduction to a gay relationships. it was never anything new to meet or have as friends that were gay and yet now i find many of my straight school friends still to this day are very bias...i don't understand why.

my understanding is you are attracted to who ever you are attracted too. laws of nature define it down to scent, sight and action...

I love a beautiful woman's body...i love looking at them and think wow, she is gorgeous...but i don't see it sexually.
i look at a naked male body, and if it stimulates me then yes i will think sexually. but there are mens bodies out there too that i will say wow he's hot but feel nothing. i am attracted to what i am attracted to...nothing less nothing more. i am me.
Quote by Dancing_Doll


It's common with gay guys enjoying the challenge of getting a straight guy too. I know several in real life that treat it as a bit of a fun sport. I'm always amused with how often they succeed too.

I don't think the thrill of the chase is exclusive to any gender or sexual orientation these days. We all love a challenge. Sometimes it's more often expressed with certain personality types.

Oh indeed.

Quote by kinkygirl
Oh Hell JohnC, don't you know that all lesbians are just guys pretending to be girls on Lush? What I'm told if I tell a guy I'm not interested. Anyone ever tell you that? Walk a mile in my shoes then condemn me. I always tell guys that the Forum is game and write anything they feel until they get make it personal.

LOL Touche'. And in all honesty I think SOME of the women on here ARE men.

But I have to say, I wasn't condemning you for anything. I hope you don't think I was, since I was not. It was an open discussion and about generalities, not you personally. I went out of my way to state that not all were like that. But I always see things posted making it appear as if it is only ONE way, when the truth is that it is not.
I'm bisexual as well....I think I'd like men better if they'd loose that hair on their face! I DON"T find it attactive at ALL! Guys, would YOU want to kiss a "brillo" pad?
Quote by Marcie4you
I'm bisexual as well....I think I'd like men better if they'd loose that hair on their face! I DON"T find it attactive at ALL! Guys, would YOU want to kiss a "brillo" pad?

LOL I have a beard. I didn't find your post insulting though. I know that some ladies like facial hair and others don't. Mine does.

But there are ways a man can keep his facial hair trimmed so that when he kisses his woman she can actually enjoy it, and get LIPS. Plus all men's facial hair does not feel the same, and can often be determined by length and other factors. So it isn't always like kissing a brillo pad.

Again, I do understand though. LOL It just made me laugh... knowing my woman has openly posted the complete opposite.