What's the hardest thing about being in a relationship with you?

Quote by firefly9973
Trust, I don't trust many people. Once you have your heart broken, trust is a hard thing to give to someone.

I am independent. I do every thing for myself. Asking or accepting help or a shoulder to lean on is not something I do. If I don't ask then they can't let me down.

I like my alone time. Some guys don't get that. They think because we are dating that we should spend all our free time together. I am a big girl I do not need you glued to my side 24/7. Apparently this line of thinking makes me a huge bitch.

Quote by Dancing_Doll
This would be my top-five.

1. Independent - I don't need to be with someone 24/7, nor do I like constant checking-in, curfews or clingy behaviour. It makes me feel suffocated. overwhelmed and it also makes me feel like I'm not trusted. I love being with the person I'm with, but I also need space to do my own thing, see my own friends etc. but still know/feel that the connection is still there.

2. I'm not romantic - and I say this in terms of 'traditional romance' - poetry, cutesy V-day cards, snuggly-baby-talk, pet names, effusive complements and "I love you's", gag-worthy PDA. With me, a little goes a long way and too much is either a turn-off or will make me laugh because I can't take it seriously. I like 'romance' or 'connecting' when done in a fun, lighthearted way or a passionate way. When it's overly sweet or cheesy, I feel like I want to withdraw.

3. I don't like conflict - I could never be with someone that likes to "fight hard and love hard". I cannot do shouting matches or heated arguments where mean words are traded and then just shrugged off later. When someone says something that hurts me, it cuts deep and the effects linger. For me - conflict resolution means conversation. When I *am* that angry, I prefer to cool down before getting into it. And I will admit - I often brush things off or avoid conflict - probably to my own detriment - just because I don't like dealing with it unless absolutely necessary. I've actually had a guy say that I was *too* easy-going by not calling him out on his shit and making him feel like I didn't care either way. He wanted a girlfriend that would 'keep him in line' and that's just not my style.

4. It's difficult to get me to be vulnerable - it takes a lot for me to open up to someone emotionally. They may think I've really opened up but it's often an illusion. Being vulnerable means I could possibly get hurt. Getting to that point is a rarity because I have certain emotional safeguards in place. This is because I've been cut to the bone before and I hate the risk involved with possibly going back to that dark place again. Stemming off this, while it takes *a lot* to truly upset me, when someone does hit that level with me and I see a glimpse of potential for that dark place, I will just shut down and walk away completely. I can become instantly cold and detached once I see something as a dead end or once something feels too emotionally risky for me (in a negative way). I'm not one of these "I need closure" girls - I don't like dragging things out if I know it's not going to work.

5. Commitment-phobic - this is kind of related to the 'vulnerability' bit and maybe even the missing romance-gene - I'm a little jaded when it comes to human relationships and their longevity. I also hate labels, especially when they're premature. So... while I can be committed, it's difficult for me to think of long-term or feel assured something is going to go the distance. I'm more of a take it one week at a time rather than fixating on notions of 'soul mates' or what the future will look like.

Quote by Dancing_Doll
This would be my top-five.

1. Independent - I don't need to be with someone 24/7, nor do I like constant checking-in, curfews or clingy behaviour. It makes me feel suffocated. overwhelmed and it also makes me feel like I'm not trusted. I love being with the person I'm with, but I also need space to do my own thing, see my own friends etc. but still know/feel that the connection is still there.

2. I'm not romantic - and I say this in terms of 'traditional romance' - poetry, cutesy V-day cards, snuggly-baby-talk, pet names, effusive complements and "I love you's", gag-worthy PDA. With me, a little goes a long way and too much is either a turn-off or will make me laugh because I can't take it seriously. I like 'romance' or 'connecting' when done in a fun, lighthearted way or a passionate way. When it's overly sweet or cheesy, I feel like I want to withdraw.

3. I don't like conflict - I could never be with someone that likes to "fight hard and love hard". I cannot do shouting matches or heated arguments where mean words are traded and then just shrugged off later. When someone says something that hurts me, it cuts deep and the effects linger. For me - conflict resolution means conversation. When I *am* that angry, I prefer to cool down before getting into it. And I will admit - I often brush things off or avoid conflict - probably to my own detriment - just because I don't like dealing with it unless absolutely necessary. I've actually had a guy say that I was *too* easy-going by not calling him out on his shit and making him feel like I didn't care either way. He wanted a girlfriend that would 'keep him in line' and that's just not my style.

4. It's difficult to get me to be vulnerable - it takes a lot for me to open up to someone emotionally. They may think I've really opened up but it's often an illusion. Being vulnerable means I could possibly get hurt. Getting to that point is a rarity because I have certain emotional safeguards in place. This is because I've been cut to the bone before and I hate the risk involved with possibly going back to that dark place again. Stemming off this, while it takes *a lot* to truly upset me, when someone does hit that level with me and I see a glimpse of potential for that dark place, I will just shut down and walk away completely. I can become instantly cold and detached once I see something as a dead end or once something feels too emotionally risky for me (in a negative way). I'm not one of these "I need closure" girls - I don't like dragging things out if I know it's not going to work.

5. Commitment-phobic - this is kind of related to the 'vulnerability' bit and maybe even the missing romance-gene - I'm a little jaded when it comes to human relationships and their longevity. I also hate labels, especially when they're premature. So... while I can be committed, it's difficult for me to think of long-term or feel assured something is going to go the distance. I'm more of a take it one week at a time rather than fixating on notions of 'soul mates' or what the future will look like.

Quote by Bipeep
I'm bi and I get frustrated with the conflict of it, let alone my long time partner!