I saw this topic on before and have searched but was unable to find it, My question is I have things on my bucket list that I know my wife will never go for, anal, mmf, ffm, to name a couple. Do I pursue them outside of my marriage or resign myself to the fact that they will never happen, what say you?
I'd say you need to see how far you can go inside your marriage before you go outside. Talk about your unmet desires. Maybe she has desires she thinks you won't go for and if you share your unmet desires, maybe she'll open up with hers. Then there's room for some sharing and trading. Or an open marriage where you both have leave to meet your desires elsewhere but share the experiences so that it's still happening within the marriage "contract".
I'm guilty as charged of not opening up about some of my needs and desires and covertly meeting some of them outside the marriage. I don't recommend it, though. The stress can outweigh any joy you get in the new experiences.
Thanks I know the hardest part is the first step, I'm not sure I could handle her rejection or having her be disgusted with me but if I don't try I wont know.
Thanks I know the hardest part is the first step, I'm not sure I could handle her rejection or having her be disgusted with me but if I don't try I wont know.
Never have sex with a bucket. Its rubbish.
Your bucket will have a hole in it if you stray from your vows.
I had once broached the subject with my ex wife about inviting another woman into our bedroom. She was totally against it and said she tried that in her first marriage and didn't like the touch or feel of another woman. After we divorced about 3 yrs ago she told me she is now living as a lesbian. Go figure. I had an inkling at the time that she was seeing another woman and when I asked she about it she denied it. Just goes to show you how well you can trust a woman.
As for your bucket list, sometimes you just have to take care of your needs. But that is just me. I did it and look where I ended up -- divorced. My ex wife was a classic bitch and deserved everything she got. Your situation is probably different. Sometimes things are just left as a fantasy and nothing more.
