Recently, people have begun trying to describe there sexual exploits, discuss relationship problems or other such topics. Typically as soon as they start, I demand they to stop, frequently by saying "shut up, I don't wanna know." as I do not want to hear about their latest sexual conquest or deal with their relationship problems. Several have called me "rude" or "a bad friend." Anybody else been in this position, and how do they deal, also is it rude/being a bad friend that I do this?
And I've only begun fucking with you people.
At the end of the day, it's all math.
Saying "shut up" is almost always rude. There are lots of other, less confrontational ways of saying you don't want to hear that stuff. "Please, I really don't want to hear that stuff" or "I'm uncomfortable talking about this with you" are immediately, big steps up from "shut up".
Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado
"shut up" is the younger generation's catch phrase, which as one advances in age and experience, is just plain rude. If one of my friends said "shut up, etc" to me ... I would be offended!
I agree with Monocle that his suggestions are terrific, especially this one: "I'm uncomfortable about discussing this."
Good luck!
You could also just shake your head and say "Whoa, TMI!"
I agree with the others it is rude just saying shut up be a little little more tactful.
Big-haired Bitch/Personality Hire
Of course it's rude. But we all think it at some point. And sure as a good friend, you should listen. But sometimes listening gets you more than you bargained for. Sometimes you're just not in the mood. And sure, if I were a good friend, I'd listen regardless of all of this. But on the other hand, if they were a good friend, they'd understand that at just that particular moment in time, I don't want to listen. We all have our limits, and it certainly doesn't make you a bad friend.
There's nothing wrong with not wanting to deal with another friend's problems. But there's a way to express this to that friend. Just be up front and say so...without the rudeness. Sometimes they're more tired of hearing themselves complain than you are.
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Eh - my friends were like that. I couldn't stand it. Not because I had some aversion to sex (obviously not) but because they expected me to share the same detail. Not happening.
My sex life would have made their eyes melt out of their sockets - Odds are, they would have thought of me differently if they heard any of it.
They were also very peppy and upbeat - imagine Blossom Russo and Syx talking a lot about sex with some sort of upbeat, peppy attitude and "Oh - I touched a penis! Oh my God - I touched a penis!" attitude.
They were annoying when it came to sex conversations. A little to cheery, a little to sparky for me. That was highschool
The last time I was around any of them was about seven years ago - long after high school days. They still had the same attitude, and they sat in the basement of their house making out with their boyfriends in front of my husband and my kids.
Yeah, I think saying that we were different species from different planets would probably cover it. Considering other things that happened after I left that town - I'm glad I didn't tell them anything about me.
I once drove an older man to pick up a car from an auction. All the way there, he kept telling me about his girlfriends. I doubt any of them was recent, and they might even have been ficticious. I responded with a hard-on, as though I was reading a really good skin-novel. I was embarrassed, not by his stories, but that I was hard, and that if he had asked me to I'd have been on him in a minute - even though he was about 40 years older than me.
