I've been asked this question several times by people newer to the lifestyle and no my opinion but I'd be interested in knowing the opinion of other seasoned Dominants and Submissives
Like many things in BDSM things are not always clearly one way or the other. A Daddy can be a mentor OR a Master. Daddies fill more than one role even in the possessive. Also Daddy Doms are often referred to as Sensual Doms. They too can be one and the same, OR different. What truly defines each is not just the titles, but the dynamic between the couple. Far too often people get too caught up in wanting to overly define roles or terms. I prefer to use the terms as more of a broad classification to help initially identify an overall "type" of role, but not fix it to a rigid parameter.
Like JohnC said, what you call each other is an individual thing and there really is no clearcut rules as to what defines each role. I know some women prefer to be called submissives than slaves because the word slave leaves a nasty taste in their mouth. Does that make them any more or less submissive?
I don't play the DaddyDom thing because I don't want to see My girl in little girls clothing. I want an adult submissive. That is My preference and that of My girl as well. But that doesn't make it right or wrong. Some people do like the DaddyDom role and to each his or her own.
D/s and BDSM are types of lifestyles that can and should be "customized" to fit the individuals participating. Don't get so hung up on titles that you lose sight of what you are there for. To enjoy each other. It doesn't matter if you are a Master, A Dom, A Daddy, or Sir. Nor does it matter if you are a submissive, a slave, a SAM or a Brat. What you are to each other is what's important.
He brings up some other good points. But I have to clarify one thing, not all Daddy Doms are into "age play". Not all Daddy Doms have "littles". I admit thought that this imagery is often thought of first when the term is used. It is also why I tend to avoid using it in general public. A Daddy Dom can (and often does) have "adult" submissives. For many the role is simply one of a mental distinction between a more mature Dom and His more tender and "youthful" (mentally) submissive and His desire to protect in a more caring way than what may be perceived in other types of Doms.
Like I pointed out above, Daddy Dom and Sensual Dom can often (and often are) interchangeable. And it does not, for a great many, hinge on the submissive wearing little girl clothing or being a "little". And even if they are, that dynamic does not center on (another misconception that is out there). There are cultures (Hispanic for one) that use the term Daddy or Poppy as a title for the more mature partner in a caring and loving relationship. Age play or reverting isn't part of the dynamic.
I see myself as a Daddy Dom to my little and she addresses me as Daddy and I her with terms like little one and baby girl. I think for me I view a Master as being more terse and severe perhaps but as a Daddy there is a strong element of caring and gentleness that I perceive as being less in a Master scenario. That is not to say that Masters do not care for their submissive counterparts at all. I think it is really a difference in how that care is expressed.
Thanks all as a submissive with my own view on the terminology it's not to hear a Dom's point of view I agree with JohnC because I call my Dom Daddy but we are most definetely not interested in the little girl age play as we already get enough of the weird looks with our realistic age difference but I have had harder Dom's before him and they were Master not Daddy does that make him any less a Dom no but a different kind it's just difficult to explain to other curious would be submissives because you're right no one D/S relationship fits any sort of mold
I'd say there is really no clear definition or distinction unless the people involved give it one. I've never understood why things always have to have a specific label or a set specifications to each role. It'll change with every relationship you come across. It's not cut and dry...we all make it our own.
I should point out that being called Sir by those in the community is different to me than a casual 'sir' from a random person.
Those in the community know me and respect that quirk of mine. Those outside do not know of it, so I calmly accept the title as they mean it in a completely different way.
I prefer to be as a daddy figure, loving, understanding. Not as a master, I don't want to dominate.
The difference lies in the personality of the sub. Those looking for "daddys" generally have some kind of unresolved Elektra Complex issue going on while those looking for a master tend to show traits of codependency - compliant, putting the needs of others first. The narcissistic tendencies of self-styled "masters" provide an opportunity to fulfil the desires of the codependent. The codependent needs to serve, the narcissist needs to feel exalted. In the most extreme cases this can prove self-destructive as they both symbiotically feed each others addictions.
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