Hey Everyone, just a curious. What attracted you to BDSM? How did you discover it or who introduced you to it?
I discovered bdsm through erotica when I was a teenager. After that I wanted to know more and read up forums and blogs before getting involved in RL. Then I frequented clubs and parties discovering new people and things that I liked/didn’t like.
Hi Birdie, I'm new here, but saw your question and thought I'd answer it. I discovered BDSM with an ex-boyfriend who asked me to spank him one day. I was only in my early twenties back then and thought his idea was quite weird at first. At some point I did it though and discovered that I liked it. He and I didn't last though and it was only with my husband that I really began to blossom as a mistress.
Kim
K.C. Harding is the pen name of a couple from the south of England. She is dominant, he is the one with many fetishes. Together they write erotic novels and stories.
Being the Master, a dominate, is something I fought against for most of my life. I always knew I craved taking complete control in the bedroom and having my way completely but I always thought it was wrong to feel that way. I kept that part of me chained deep inside myself because I was afraid to let it out. That doing so would make me a bad person. But then I met my first sub, Lacey. I met her through Seeking Arrangement. We never discussed anything about her being a sub and I didn't know she was. But from the very first time we were together she just naturally brought out my inner Master. I'm a very passionate man and I can really pickup on a person's energy and somewhat intuitively know what they feel. I've always been a good lover because of this because I read a woman's body after I've gotten to know her and know what it needs. Lacey was the first true submissive I had ever been with and without ever saying a word about it I could literally feel the need in her to be taken and controlled and used. And as I did those things for her I simply became the Master. When she finally broke through those chains and I unleashed my inner Master I finally, for the first time in my life, felt totally and completely sexually fulfilled. It came so natural from then on. So we spent about 6 months with her as my submissive. She wore a black silk choker everyday as a reminder that she was mine.
In her particular case she really needed a full time Master even though we only saw each other about once a week. We texted every day I would give her tasks to do such as edging (rubbing herself until she almost came but stopping short) and "slapping" her pussy 10 times every hour that day. She had to always refer to me as Master and always be formal even in text. She was really bad about being late and she received a good many spankings for that! I quickly accumulated a number of paddling/whipping tools such as a leather riding crop, a rattan cane, a suede flogger, a wooden paddle and a cat of nine-tails. She very much loved pain because it made her cum all the harder so I think she would make sure to earn punishments every time she visited. She was very much into bondage as well and I acquired a nice set of gear and every time she visited I came up with a new way to restrainer her. Even suspending her by wrist cuffs. That was one hell of a night.
I actually wrote a contract which we both sign stipulating the terms of our arrangement. It outlined both our hard limits (no feces play, no bloodletting), defined the submissive's role as well as my responsibilities. It also defined the safe words. I use a 2 word system. Yellow for "I"m getting close to a boundary here" and Red for "STOP STOP STOP". I still have a copy of it in my safe. And so she became my "Kitten". For her the Kitten phase was a training phase. I defined specific physical capabilities she must possess as well as attitudes. When she met these requirements she would get promoted to Princess. As my Kitten she was only allowed to spend time with me in a hotel room or in my bedroom. I never took her out in public. She could only accompany me out in public after she became my Princess. Had she made it we were going to celebrate by going to a swinger’s club in Dallas. Unfortunately, it came to an end before she became Princess.
I'm married now and my wife isn't a true submissive, but her body is mine to do with as I please and the love we share makes the sex we have the most amazing, more than I could ever have imagined. I wouldn't have been able to let myself go with her had I not unleashed my inner Master.
This is a good question.
I think I should put my answer into a story!
I am going to a munch for the first time not sure what to expect
I always knew I had it in me. Just never explored it. Was in a very stable relationship, and the status quo reigned. Then one day, I was just sending comments back and forth over a meme posted online with another woman. The exchange led to chat, which led to sexting. Then it just escalated into a online Dom/sub relationship. I eventually met her, but circumstances are such that we no longer keep in touch.
That opened a can of worm, and I fell into a rabbit hole from there. I started exploring my Dom side, and got quite good at hypnokink even.
i am really new to this and very curious wonder were someone would find a dominant women for starters i am in canada
Believe it or not, I was in a Roman Catholic Seminary.
I had never had much luck with the ladies. Some but something about it never seemed as fulfilling as I had expected.
I thought, "Well, this is not for me."
I met a woman online, a schoolteacher. (Yes, she really was. We're still friends---it's been almost 20 years now.) We talked about poetry and whatnot. (We didn't meet on a sex site.)
She was a few years younger than me but much more mature. She had been married. And like I said, she was a teacher. She's great about tuning in to where people are at and meeting them there.
I trusted her. She was curious about seminary too. "Celibate, right? Are you sure that's what you want for yourself?"
I had stumbled across a femdom site, more words than pictures. Stories and letters. The term 'femdom' was new to me.
I realized I had always been drawn to sexually assertive women, strong women, what I came to call dominant women. But I never thought I could be much use to them.
Anyway, one night on the phone I asked my friend if she heard of the term "femdom". She paused and said, "How much truth can you handle?"
Turns out she was very kinky. Also very good at 'normal' conversation with people she wasn't "playing with."
She introduced me The Dance and I will forever be in her debt.
(I never did become a priest.)
I'm going to go read one of your books, they look so tempting.
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