You start dating a girl and things are going well. You're really into her. Then you find out that she's still really close friends with her ex-boyfriend.
Does this bother you?
Would it bother you more if you met him on a random social occasion and found out that he is better looking, richer, taller, or more successful than you?
Let's say she tells you that they are now just platonic friends but that she still enjoys talking to and hanging out with him on occasion.
** Note: Girls, feel free to answer this question as well, in terms of your man having ex-girlfriends he still likes to hang out with.
Would have to have sex with her and simultaniously.... make love to her and fuck her hard enough that she will only be thinking about you rather than him... but if she wants him.... let her have him or anybody else in her life... you can't keep her if she doesn't want to stay. At least you will have a good fuck to remember!
Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado
one must always remember, they have become your "ex" for a reason.
(I know this is ask the guys, but it's from a woman's perspective - hope you don't mind)
there will always be the ex that is taller or shorter, prettier or more handsome, better ass, richer or has a better career, etc. BUT .... remember that your current Significant Other is WITH YOU .... not that ex.
my advice ... relax. If they are mature and can have a platonic relationship ... that is awesome in my books. We all need friends ... it's important fact of life.
If someone really wanted to get back with their ex .... they will. You can't control what some else does ... you can only control how you react to it.
I would feel the other way about than previous answers.
No, it wouldnt bother me if they were smarter, funnier, richer, more good looking etc. These are all subjective qualities anyway - eg. richer doesnt necessarily mean having more money.
Yes, it would bother me a lot if they were still friends. I wouldnt stay good friends with an ex (unless there was a very good reason) out of respect for my new partner.
Thats not to stop them being civil to an ex partner, I just wouldnt want my girlfriend to pop around to her ex's for a cup of coffee and a movie.
I am sorry, but I would drop the girl in a heartbeat if this was the case. If they are you're ex, then you don't need to be friends with them. If you're friends, then do that, but I wont be in your life in anyway shape or form if that is the case
I was actually on this boat when my current gf and I started dating. & I was honestly totally fine with it. They work in the same area, same building actually and texted often. It was fine. Nothing out of the normal until he started talking to her about still having feelings for her, that he got jealous when he saw us together (Which I found creepy as fuck seeing as I have never met him), he claimed her as "HIS" even though we are dating (WTF Right?) then tried talking her out of dating me and going back to him since I wasnt her type or right for her. again, even though we never met.
I think its fine to have friends like that... Until it gets to be very... well when it feels wrong and bad. Then you need to talk about it. But when I found out about that, I was pissed and like. No, he goes now. and she was very understanding.
"Do you want to live to work or work to live"
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing"
"Always hold you head up high, never come off weak"
Michael
Being completely honest - it would drive me crazy - I'd hate it. Even if I was better looking, richer etc.
But it'd be my problem not hers and the most important part of a relationship is trust so if I couldn't get over it then it's probably not ever going to work out. I'd still recognise that it's my issue and I should probably just grow up, but you can't help how you feel can you?
I guess it depends who it is. I have dated ex-girlfriends of some of my best buddies and we didn't have a problem. But I am meaner than they are.bo5PjnKkaAMwgERB
I'm not really mean.BzbFQ3T2dwXb2JfK
If I would be serious about "this" relationship, I'd ask to stay away/cut loose her "friend" if she wouldn't comply easily I'd do the same. See if it'll go well (honestly doubt it will) and go from there.
Would not bother me at all, not the jealous kind, so if she had her ex as a good friend I would be cool with it.
Trust is important in a relationship.
It wouldn't bother me at all. If they broke up, then it's over. I'd be more concered with a girl who viewed all of her exes as enemies of the state who she carries long lasting grudges. If the broke up just because things didn't work out. If they broke up because he cheated or hit her or something like that, it's different. Most couples have lots of common friends. Just because they break up shouldn't mean that one or the other can't still hang out with the group of friends they share.
If they're friends, no problem. Now, if I see either of them getting a little too touchy feely. Or other signs that he still has a thing for her, I'd mention it. Let her know that he's looking for more. But I'd trust her and her judgement. Until something inappropriate happened, I wouldn't ask her to modify her behavior or interactions.
When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates Not the Jealous type. Would not bother me at all...
I used to hang out with 3 of my bf's exes and they're all bitches that he can't stand, so I'd be very surprised if he turned around and said he'd been chatting to one of them!