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Talk about sex but he hasn't made a move. Why?

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Active Ink Slinger
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My guy friend and I are very good friends (To the point people have stipulated that we are dating or a couple) and most met ups we do talk about sex be it past experiences, admitting checking and admiring each other, things we like about sex, philosophy of sex... just topic of sex.
There feels some sort of sexual tension there but neither has made the move. I haven't made a move because I'm afraid of rejection and I guess maybe once crossing that sexual boundary where to go from there.

Just want to know from a guy's perspective why he hasn't made a move?

Headbanging ape from cold North 🤘
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Well, it could be the same reasons as you.

Or perhaps it's his perception of your reluctance. Maybe he thinks you have reasons for not going there and wants to respect your boundaries (Right, a guy respecting a woman's boundaries. I'm sure it can happen.)

Or maybe there's something he's heard in the conversations that makes him hold back? Something about your sexual interests or desires that he is unsure of being able to fulfill?

Unfortunately, the solution for all of them is probably for you to be upfront, at least somewhat, about where you want this to end.

Maybe just moving the conversation beyond just talking about sex and actually getting flirty might be enough? That way you don't have to come right out and say that you want to get in his pants unless he continues to hold back.

I am probably not the best guy to try to get inside another guy's head. I know that I can be a bit off the beaten path. But those are what occurred to me at first blush.

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Active Ink Slinger
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well for me ,I have two kind of women in my life those who are friends and those I have sex with. Have you tried just telling you want to fuck

Dirty Stop-out
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Ok. I know you’re asking the guys but I’m fed up of hearing from guys later who said they held back because they didn’t know if I wanted it. I think the good guys are scared of crossing a line without consent snd I really think you should just give him a big flashing sign that you’d like him to make a move as in my experience guys suck at subtlety

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Active Ink Slinger
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I think Seeker4 made some very good points in his first post. Something about the previous conversations you have had, has made him hesitant about making the first move. He may not be sure if it is something you really want to do with "him" if you bring up past relationships often. It may take you flirting in such a way that he gets the hint you are truly interested in having sex with him. Good luck.

Active Ink Slinger
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Either of you recently out of bad relationships? That sometimes creates a hurdle. You are also hesitating. Sometimes two people get caught up waiting for the other to make the first move. Could be your both afraid of rejection.

The solution? Same as it always is… open communication. You might need to be the one to break the stalemate. If you feel like he should be the one be aware this could not happen anytime soon, or it could happen tomorrow.

Simple Scribbler
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I’ve learned from dating sites, that while unpleasant, rejection is survivable. And it frees your mind from that “what if” limbo. Bravely tell him what you’ve told us. Good luck! smile

Active Ink Slinger
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I had a similar situation. A lady and I were best friends for two years. We went places, did fun things, everyone thought we were an item, but we never got past the friendship mode. For me the reason was I did not want to ruin the friendship. If I could go back, I would take a chance and talk to her honestly. My advice to you is to talk to him.