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Kinky masturbation advice?

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Hey, so i'm wondering if any of my fellow males would be able to give me some tips/ stories/ personal experiences/advice on how to make masturbation a bit more erotic and kinky? Wether its' using objects or food or whatever??

im just getting a bit tired of the same old normal wanking im doing currently,

thanks,

AusBoy
Turn your hand around backwards ( looks like someone else is playing with your cock) HAHA Try switching hands several times
Quote by Aus-Boy
Hey, so i'm wondering if any of my fellow males would be able to give me some tips/ stories/ personal experiences/advice on how to make masturbation a bit more erotic and kinky? Wether its' using objects or food or whatever??

im just getting a bit tired of the same old normal wanking im doing currently,

thanks,

AusBoy


Obtain a beefsteak tomato. The one pictured is small (they grow much larger). Core out the center to maybe 1/4 inch less your erect diameter.

Microwave on 'Reheat' setting...approximately 35 seconds. Remove and hold in hand...do not start fucking the fruit immediately or you might, well...

It'd be the last damned time you took my advice.



$2.99 per pound in US stores. For under $10 USD...you may never go back to chasing skirt again.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
How about shoving a ball gag in your mouth, strangling yourself with one hand and fucking some sort of fruit, maybe even adding some anal stimulation for good measure (figging, maybe?). That kinky enough?
put a tissue over your boner and pretend its a ghost.
Quote by winky
put a tissue over your boner and pretend its a ghost.

Sounds so absurd I may have to try it lol.
Quote by winky
put a tissue over your boner and pretend its a ghost.


If that's your idea of a good costume I want to go trick or treating with you, lol


Have you tried incorporating a little anal play into your sessions, just teasing or lightly fingering your ass can be very pleasurable. Or you can try doing it outdoors/in public, that's a lot of fun too.
This post comes to you from the original and highly disorganised mind of mine...be scared, I certainly am, lol
Try applying some synthetic lube all around and a little ass play as above, you can go for ages just dont race to the finish!
I agree about teasing your ass. some other things you could try would be incorporating different toys. ( cock rings, sleeves, anal beeds, vibrators, anything that turns you on) Maybe try to masterbate in a place you might(could) get caught adds a little risk.
Kinky masturbation advice?


Try to stay away from incorporating the blender....
Are you cut or uncut. I can only give advice on uncut.

Most (not all) of the above is worth trying, but try different lubes, that can be fun.

Being uncut, I can wank my foreskin over the bell end and thats O.K. but its even better to just wank the shaft, movements of just an inch or so (depends on how you are built), plenty of pressure and try and make it last, recommended.

But hey, if you've got any ideas let us all know.
Get a Fleshlight, they are awesome. A penis pump or vibrating cock ring, can also add another dimension. Add a slim, well lubed butt plug. How about different lubes and/or gloves? Try using different methods of applying pressure, like laying over a pillow or pushing it between the cushions of a chair. If you have some kinky cyber friends, like on Lush, ask them to write you a "mandatory masturbation scene" where you must get yourself off in the manner they describe. I've both written, and received those and they are fun. Someone suggested doing it where you might get caught; DON'T, it would rush the act and you could end up in jail. However, doing it somewhere that allows you to see, but not be seen, like in a dark room at night with curtains back, can add a little thrill. Then too there are solo golden showers.dSqY7AIOtwTlAtQh
Share it with a stranger. For example, once I was on the phone seeking tech support for a device I'd recently brought home from the store, and of course I couldn't figure it out. The young woman who got my call in the call center had a wonderfully sexy voice, and so I flirted with her verbally while we sussed out the problem. And it was frankly making me very hot. Since I hadn't given my name or anything like that to her, I decided to have a little fun with her, and so I said something along the lines of "you know, I hate to end this call... you have a very sexy voice, if you don't mind my saying so."

She giggled and thanked me in a sincere, flattered, somewhat embarrassed tone, and said "I'm glad you're pleased" or something similar that wouldn't get her co-workers to wonder.

I decided then and there to double down and so I took a deep breath and said, "Really, I'm serious. Miss, I don't know if you can appreciate how truly sexy your voice is or the effect it can have on men, but to be very honest it's made me very hot, and I'm going to have to do something about that as soon as we're off the phone..." and then I paused just long enough to hear her gasp slightly before saying, "unless you'd like me to do it while we're on the phone together, so you can hear me get off." Then, before she could hang up or rebuke me or anything I rushed to add something like, "I'm sorry I suppose that might seem rude but I just can't help it your voice is so sexy I don't care if it's right or wrong and I think it would be so sexy to hear you talking while I do it, and to know you know...."

There was a long pause, but she didn't hang up. Finally she spoke, timidly saying, "Sir... I... might be able to help you with that, but... I'm not sure. I don't think..."

I interrupted her before she could object and I said, "just pretend you're still helping me with my problem and listen... if you don't want to, you can hang up."

She didn't answer, and I took my cock out. At this point, I was gonna jerk off with or without her listening. But she didn't hang up. "I've got it out now... it's very hard for you."

"I see..." she said, sounding breathless, clearly being careful about what she said. "Are you... going to take the next step now?"

"I am," I said, "I'm stroking my cock right now. Start talking to me so I can hear your voice... it doesn't matter what you say...."

"Oh God," she said softly, and then she began to talk to me randomly about the device I'd called about in the first place, slipping sly sexual references in here and there.

This went on for a while as I told her frankly what I was doing in detail, and she pretended to be talking about tech support. Soon enough I was ready to blow, and told her so, and she said something like, "OK... go ahead and give it a try and tell me how it goes...."

I came hard grunting softly but being careful not to be too loud so the person in the next cubicle wouldn't hear me over her phone, and then when my head cleared I laughed at myself for making such a mess, and she giggled and said something like, "well, it seems like everything worked."

I thanked her, and she said, "no, thank you, sir. It was a PLEASURE doing business with you. But I do need to go now... I think I actually need a break right away."

I laughed and said, "to run to the ladies room and get yourself off now?"

"Yes, of course," she said with an audible grin. "Gotta go. You have a wonderful day, sir, and thanks for choosing (company name redacted to protect the guilty). I appreciated your business."

Ever since then, I sometimes try to draw a sexy sounding customer service girl into a little free phone sex. You'd be surprised how many go for it. And sometimes I don't even tell them, and just jerk off while we talk in secret - which is hot too. Especially when the you know the gal on the other end but couldn't tell her. The one exception is a woman I know (can't say here who) that knows about my penchant for masturbating while talking on the phone, and she thinks it's cute. We agreed once long ago that she would love it if I did it whenever we talk, and whenever we do I do if I have the privacy. I always tell her, and she says things like "enjoy yourself" and "let me know when you're gonna cum", and every so often will ask me how far along I am, and will answer questions like "what are you wearing" etc. She's good about giving me mental pictures too... But this is interspersed with regular conversation.
I'm a wild and Krrraaazzzy Guy!
I also suggest some anal stimulation. Do not make the mistake, if you are a beginner, of rushing into it. For the first couple of sessions take it VERY lightly. Do not penetrate deeply, just let your body associate that feeling around your ass with the pleasure you are feeling in your cock. Over time, the association will grow stronger (as you penetrate deeper and deeper) just touching your ass will cause your cock to jump. Enjoy smile
Put yourself in a risky situation where someone could walk in or see you at anytime.
Try a jar of Maggots or a fresh baked loaf with the end cut off, or a can of Worms
so things i've tried and really enjoyed:
throwing my hips over my head as close as i ca, getting my cock above my mouth and jerking off so it cums in my mouth (do use this position for too long tho)...can play with yes ass too (see below)
also, sometimes, i'll warm a large carrot and slicker it up with olive oil (virgin of course) and fuck myself while i'm jerking
and/or, fuck a soft melon,,,cut a tight hole for yer cock and on opposite side cut a fairly small hole to add suction
and/or, (if yer into gs), lay in the tub of elsewhere (barefloor for easy cleanup) and pee on yerself...let the warm fluid get all over you, pee in yer mouth if you want.
there are so many ways to please one's self...use a great imagination and be adventurous...have fun.
Quote by Gurlyboy

Sounds so absurd I may have to try it lol.


Although, you know, if you forget and look down you could scare the shit out of yourself lol. For Gurlyboy, "Oh fuck! Where did that HUGE ghost come from?!"



Ferte in noctem animam meam, Illustre stelle viam meam. Aspectu illo glorior, Dum capit nox diem. Cantate vitae canticu, Sine dolore acte, Dicite eis quos amabam, Numquam obliviscar.