A few months back I picked up a girl at my local hangout (bar). I didn't really like her when I met her but she was hot and I was horny. I figured what the hell, count it up as a one night stand.
Well several months later, we are still dating and still fucking. She is wild in bed. Loves 3somes and we have had a few. Loves roleplay, rough sex, loves to use a strap on, gives great head, into anal, and so forth. She is one of the best lays I have ever had.
But outside the bedroom, I can hardly stand to be around her. We have nothing in common plus at times she is just downright rude. We go out and she is constantly demeaning to waitresses, etc. She hates anything to do with the outdoors. It's hard to even watch a movie with her. If it is not some sappy love story or chick flick she refuses to watch it.
I am not really looking for a relationship. But she is. I know right now I don't want to go further. She has a son and is looking for a husband and dad for him. I have been honest with her that it is not what I am looking for but I have never told her that I don't think with her it would ever happen anyway. It is just kind of out there.
I feel guilty at times for enjoying the sex so much, and for leading her on in a sense. But then again I don't know how to tell her I just don't like her as a person. I have always believed you like a person for who they are and not try to change them.
Anyone ever been in this type of situation and how did you handle it?
Actually I think that would be showing one's true character. Not exactly esteem like.
I know I clearly don't have enough experience in this scenario, however you have mentioned that she has a son and is looking for a Husband and a Father for him. I think this point is quite important. Depending on how old the child is, I would say that you shouldn't be in this relationship mainly because if your not looking to stick around then dont let the son get attached to you.
Regardless of the above, if she is looking for the relationship and your not, and even based on what you have said about not being able to stand her when your outside the bedroom, I have to question how happy you really are with her. Sure she is good in bed, but if thats all there is too it and you both see different futures with each other, why continue?
But I shall reiterate, I dont think I have enough experience in this area with women that have children. This is just my opinion.
Just tell her whats really on your mind before things get too out of hand.
Best thing to do is to be honest with her. If you know what she is looking for, you should be honest with her. If she knows you're not looking for a relationship right now, especially one so serious and still fucks you, well that's on her then. However, if she doesn't know, and you're leading her on, you need to just man the fuck up, even if it means you're not getting your dick wet. I'm sure you can find another pussy to bury yourself into, and let her move the hell on.
I'll say it again....I have told her point blank that I do not want a relationship. She knows that. I have made that clear to her. My last two relationships including 5 years of marriage ended really bad. I do not want to even face the possibility of that again for awhile.
I am just not sure that she knows that there will probably never be. And it has nothing to do with when or if I want a relationship. She has never asked me if I think there can be more later. I just think in the back of my mind that she thinks there will be.
Maybe I am just thinking wrong and don't want to bring it up because I am afraid she will ask why.
As it is right now she knows I see other people and she sees a lot of guys and girls too. Sometimes we even go weeks in between seeing or talking. And then we'll hook up a few times in the same week.
If you're just out of a long-term relationship it's likely that all you're looking for is casual sex. You're drawn back to her because you know she's an easy lay and your options are limited. She doesn't understand you because you say don't want a relationship with her but then you keep on ending up in bed together.
Hard as it may seem, you need to stop thinking with your dick because at the moment you're falling into a relationship out of nothing more than laziness. You will not be able to do this without hurting her feelings - life is tough, she'll get over it. You'll look like an asshole, you'll get over that too.
Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.
Why not read some stories instead
NEW! Want a quick read for your coffee break? Why not try this... Flash Erotica: Scrubber As it is right now she knows I see other people and she sees a lot of guys and girls too. Sometimes we even go weeks in between seeing or talking. And then we'll hook up a few times in the same week.
Wear a condom.
It sounds more like a FWB situation, but more complicated. As you've been seeing each other for a while,
it might be wise to sit down and talk about it before the lines really do blur. The fact that she has a child (who you hardly see)
changes things. I think children need a steady influence in their lives. You say that you date, and the sex is hot.
The sex may cool at some point, and what are you left with? You could remain FWB's without the dating,
but there's always the risk that she'll still be expecting more from you. Whatever you decide, good luck.
Thanks everyone for the comments and advice.
We are talking tonight.
I can't exactly say I have been with someone I didn't really like at all because if I've fucked her so something must have attracted me to her
Have some self respect and respect for her
I have no desire to have sex with anyone I do not have a special connection with.