Could you trust her?

4 Jul 2011

Dear Tom, the girl friend is is not your God, you need not doubt, you need not trust, it’s a game , don't make it so serious! but you have been told to trust your gf or to trust your bf, and because of this very teaching, distrust arises, in fact, you have been told to trust, for centuries it has been known that it is very difficult to trust your own wife, very difficult to trust your own husband, this is next to impossible

Tom, there’s no need to trust or not to trust,why bring in the question of trust? it’s just a game! play it joyfully, you making it too serious, and when you start demanding, "Be faithful to me!" you are creating a situation in which it will become impossible for the poor girl to be faithful to you, give her total freedom, then she may be faithful to you.

There is no need to demand these things i.e. trust, faith, live together joyously, make as much out of your being together as possible, rather than doing that, people create such problems, useless problems, and destroy all their joys, the gf has no obligation to be faithful to you, neither do you have any obligation to be faithful to her, you love her, she loves you, that's enough

4 Jul 2011

Only you can know the answer to that, because after all it hasnt been her that's been cheating, she's been a free agent! I don't agree with hooking up with married men but has she ever cheated when she's been in a relationship? Have you ever suspected her of cheating on you? Do you trust her?
If you do trust her and she has done nothing to question that trust, then you are right to trust her. Talk to her about your concerns over her getting with married men but be careful to not be hurtful or accusing- I'm sure you two will work it out and wish you all the best smile

By the way, ^^^ @ erectus_2011 love is not a game. You're exactly the type that I wouldn't trust.

You must give up the life that you had planned, in order to live the life that is waiting for you..

4 Jul 2011

Quote by aalily
Only you can know the answer to that, because after all it hasnt been her that's been cheating, she's been a free agent! I don't agree with hooking up with married men but has she ever cheated when she's been in a relationship? Have you ever suspected her of cheating on you? Do you trust her?
If you do trust her and she has done nothing to question that trust, then you are right to trust her. Talk to her about your concerns over her getting with married men but be careful to not be hurtful or accusing- I'm sure you two will work it out and wish you all the best

By the way, ^^^ @ erectus_2011 love is not a game. You're exactly the type that I wouldn't trust.

Dear Aalily, to trust or not is up to you , to elaborate more I would say, everything in life is a game when you closely and truly look at it,life is full of uncertianities , you don’t know what’s going to happen next moment ,there will be a surprise roll of the dice, or turn of a card that ends your turn or allows you to win it all, however, when you love someone and they love you, it doesn't matter who wins the game,there will always be a time when you have to place all your chips on the table and hope for the best, without big risks don't come big rewards, remember sometimes it's your pocket change on the line or sometimes it's your house or sometimes it's someones heart, maybe even your own, hence I suggest live the moments, keep on loving, don’t fear the future or the unknown

4 Jul 2011

If you're under 25, fuck it. If you're looking for the long haul. Dump and move on.

4 Jul 2011

Quote by eviotis
If you're under 25, fuck it. If you're looking for the long haul. Dump and move on.

I like your thinking, Eviotis!

So Tom ~ Life is short .... live without regrets or at least be able to fix 'em quickly and satisfactorily!

5 Jul 2011

Depends on what you are upset about. I'm not sure what the big issue is, it's not that she was seeing these guys behind your back.

If it bothers you a lot, then maybe she's no right... but I don't see a big issue there.

5 Jul 2011

if you engage into relationship you should have trust, don't marry someone if your thinking twice much more having a doubt

mrgay

5 Jul 2011

I say trust her. She told you about her past. She isn't trying to hide it from you. Respect the fact that she told you at all, because she really didn't have to.
Keep in mind though, I'm not a jealous person, I don't really understand jealousy. I'm also a person who trust until they are burnt. Then I just learn my lesson about that person and move on. I don't dwell on things I can't change. And I'm not willing to push away a person who hasn't wronged me.

5 Jul 2011

without honesty, we have no trust ... I'm sure you can work it out dude and good luck with the marriage :-)

6 Jul 2011

Even though she was not the one "cheating" in those prior relationships, my hunch is that she doesn't exactly believe in the sanctity of monogamous relationships. She obviously knew that the guys were cheating, and it didn't bother her much. So, after you marry her and the sexual passion starts to diminish, is she going to still be happy in the relationship, if you insist on monogamy? Either don't marry her, or marry her and accept the fact that she is going to eventually need a little something outside the marriage to keep her happy. But don't marry her and at the same time expect her to act in a way that is not really in keeping with her needs and desires.

6 Jul 2011

Quote by erectus_2011
Quote by aalily
Only you can know the answer to that, because after all it hasnt been her that's been cheating, she's been a free agent! I don't agree with hooking up with married men but has she ever cheated when she's been in a relationship? Have you ever suspected her of cheating on you? Do you trust her?
If you do trust her and she has done nothing to question that trust, then you are right to trust her. Talk to her about your concerns over her getting with married men but be careful to not be hurtful or accusing- I'm sure you two will work it out and wish you all the best

By the way, ^^^ @ erectus_2011 love is not a game. You're exactly the type that I wouldn't trust.

Dear Aalily, to trust or not is up to you , to elaborate more I would say, everything in life is a game when you closely and truly look at it,life is full of uncertianities , you don’t know what’s going to happen next moment ,there will be a surprise roll of the dice, or turn of a card that ends your turn or allows you to win it all, however, when you love someone and they love you, it doesn't matter who wins the game,there will always be a time when you have to place all your chips on the table and hope for the best, without big risks don't come big rewards, remember sometimes it's your pocket change on the line or sometimes it's your house or sometimes it's someones heart, maybe even your own, hence I suggest live the moments, keep on loving, don’t fear the future or the unknown

Care to stretch out that metaphor a bit more? ;)

The idea of life as a game is selfish - in most games the winner takes all - the winner in your case being you alone. Which is how you'll end up.

Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.

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