Lurker
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Who do you prefer take charge in bed? I'm curious if I should let the girls I go out with take charge of me, or should I be the one leading this dance?
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What kind of guy do you like in bed?
Guy who dominates the bed.
18 votes
remaining
Guy who leads you in bed.
(19 votes) 106%
Equal between partner.
(16 votes) 89%
You lead the sex.
(2 votes) 11%
You dominate the sex.
(0 votes) 0%
Other
(3 votes) 17%
Active Ink Slinger
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If you're in an equal relationship, it should be equal, however we usually just go with whoever initiated it taking charge for the evening.
"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere." - Groucho Marx
Internet Sensation
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It depends on the mood and what sort of guy Im with.
If he'a not a person who takes charge I do, if he's taking charge I mostly let him, though I hate beeing passive.
It usually switches between both I guess.
I love to seduce. But I'm a bit of a tease so at times the guy needs to take control before I drive us both insane.
If he'a not a person who takes charge I do, if he's taking charge I mostly let him, though I hate beeing passive.
It usually switches between both I guess.
I love to seduce. But I'm a bit of a tease so at times the guy needs to take control before I drive us both insane.
Moderator
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Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told. 
It depends on the mood at the time.
It depends on the mood at the time.
Lurker
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So it pretty much comes down to two things: A. The mood. B. Who starts it. Seems simple enough, but it never is when the time comes.
Lurker
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Quote by Lisa
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told.
This. I have to feel comforatable with my partner before I take charge, so in the beginnings of a new relationship its usually him that initiates and takes charge until I can stop being shy
Active Ink Slinger
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All depends on my mood as well.
Lurker
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Quote by Lisa
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told.
Ditto
Lush Legend
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Quote by Lisa
Sometimes he takes charge, sometimes he does what he's told.
My sentiments exactly....lol
"Love all, trust a few, and do wrong to none."
Lurker
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My hat's off to Lisa. Everyone seems to like your answer so I think I'm gonna try and look for the signs in the future instead of just deciding before I start about whether I'm going to lead or let her lead. Thanks all! =d>
Lurker
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you left out 'does the dishes after' lol...
Lurker
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Usually, I dominate over Tech, but it doesn't stop her from doing something sexy and unexpected for me. We know what is fun and exciting and erotic for the other person and "just do it". Even though I am supposed to call the shots, we do whatever we feel like doing that whole night and even then we run out of time.
Active Ink Slinger
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rocco are you and teck like...married and living together? or what.....and where did you guys meet?
Lurker
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Tech and I met in a chat room, believe it or not. It was the first time I'd met someone online who lived close to me. To make a long story short, we eventually met and hit it off.
I'm married but separated. (Wife and I are happy this way and she has a boyfriend now, too.) Tech is married and has a loving hubby and family. It's an open marriage and he knows all about me. That shocks a lot of people, but it has worked very well, for over a year and a half now. Tech feels she's the luckiest woman in the world, having two men she's in love with.
Whether people agree with our relationship or not doesn't concern us. We only know it works for us.
I'm married but separated. (Wife and I are happy this way and she has a boyfriend now, too.) Tech is married and has a loving hubby and family. It's an open marriage and he knows all about me. That shocks a lot of people, but it has worked very well, for over a year and a half now. Tech feels she's the luckiest woman in the world, having two men she's in love with.
Whether people agree with our relationship or not doesn't concern us. We only know it works for us.
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by roccotool
Tech feels she's the luckiest woman in the world, having two men she's in love with.
Whether people agree with our relationship or not doesn't concern us. We only know it works for us.
Tech is the luckiest woman in the world. She has not only 1 but 2 men who love and care for her deeply! Whether other people agree or not does not matter.....what matters is what makes you guys happy! Good for you!
Lurker
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Thanks, fystee. It's nice to hear someone else understands our unique relationship.
Lurker
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You are both incredibly lucky, Rocco, as is Tech's hubby. I don't get why some people view love as a zero-sum game. I am quite sure that Tech's love for you in no way diminishes her love for her husband. Good on you both, and the world needs more people like you!
In a world where love is so hard to find and keep, why does it matter what shape a relationship takes, as long as everyone involved is aware of the others and happy with the situation?
In a world where love is so hard to find and keep, why does it matter what shape a relationship takes, as long as everyone involved is aware of the others and happy with the situation?
Lurker
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Rocco if Tech's husband is anything like you she is indeed very lucky.
Active Ink Slinger
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she is very lucky! I want someone like you Rocco!
Lurker
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Quote by roccotool
Thanks, fystee. It's nice to hear someone else understands our unique relationship.
Rocco, my relational life is at times incredibly complex, two men, one woman, so on, and always, it's open, with the paramount issues no jealousy, safety, respect all 'round. Sometimes we mix it up, other times we are in separate orbits. I delightedly applaud others who can navigate the waters of the non-traditional. It's incredible when it works, congrats to you and Tech (and your respective others) for making it so.
Ciao, dolls,
~Dare
Lurker
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Groan, as usual, I'll take the minority position. As a Dominant, I do not need to control every aspect of sex and sensuality, but I do look for men who are very strong (physically, mentally, emotionally) against whom I can push. We play as equals until such time as my native Dominance sees a natural place to take the lead, and that which is inside them that wishes to yield does so.
In casual encounters, I am great at equals, but in my relational life, in my committed relationships, my Dominance is my set point.
All except for with one person who draws for the scintilla of submissive energy that exists inside me...:>
In casual encounters, I am great at equals, but in my relational life, in my committed relationships, my Dominance is my set point.
All except for with one person who draws for the scintilla of submissive energy that exists inside me...:>
Active Ink Slinger
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i love being dominated, i like men to be nasty and forceful to me in bed.
Active Ink Slinger
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Matriarch
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A warm one.
Lurker
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I always start of being dominate in bed, but then the men I have been with in the past are just are able to make me feel so overcome with passion, I just end up having to give in. My ex used to like B+B and he always liked me to be the dominent one which I used to enjoy, but it did get a bit one-sided and I felt very left out of attention for me.
ha ha Nic a warm one LOL
ha ha Nic a warm one LOL
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It should be equal in the bed, but if your in BDSM relationship/marriage i'll say the Dominant Man/woman or if they want to change it up a bit the Submissive may have a hand at it
Lurker
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There is no definitive answer to your question except to say it depends on the girl.
Personally I only like it when the guy or gal I'm with is in charge
Personally I only like it when the guy or gal I'm with is in charge
Active Ink Slinger
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Well it does depend on the chemistry and mood of the couple right? I mean generally I prefer the guy to be confident and to be somewhat of a "take charge" kind of person. On the other hand I also can be a terrible tease and very flirtatious and if I'm in the right mood I can be quite aggressive actually. People think I look "sweet" and "innocent", but hehe not always. With girls I have always been pretty passive except for one or two times when I was quite drunk hehe. IDK? I sound messed up right? Haha probably everyone is like this.
Lurker
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A live one.