wow never knew so many ladies with similalr problems, see my profile for my situation what i call my rant, it has got worse wth him drunk, me been a very bad girl fucking someone i should not, although he spies on us. plus a violent streak and more. got to get away any offers must have a nice home, rich, near a beach, loves sex and sex and sex, send 2 one way tickets one for me one for my little girl xxxxx
My twelve year marriage was sexless for final two and a half years, before we finally seperated. Of course I missed the physical side in that time, I love sex and have always had a high sex drive, but worse than that was the loss of comfort, closeness and love that sex brings. I lost all confidence when my husband rejected my obvious advances, we became like a Brother and Sister living in the same house. I started to find fault in myself. "Was I no longer attractive, should I try even harder", even wondering if my pussy had lost its elasticity having had 2 kids. I was emotionaly drained in the end and it tipped our already difficult marriage into a final downward spiral that councilling, endless talking and weekends without the kids just could'nt resolve. I never want to go through that again. IMO, unless there are health reasons, a partnership without regular sex is only half a partnership.
Pretending im a girl.
I've been in a relationship for 4 1/2 years now with my girlfriend / mother of children. And ever since we got knocked up the first time the sex well dried up badly. We had sex once ever 3-6months. Two years ago I caught her, twice, cheating on me. I should have left her, but things were to difficult to just leave, so I stayed and been stuck still in a very sexless, at times, relationship. That's why I spend a lot of time here looking to full fill my needs.
I have been in a very long relationship (close to 40 years), and as with many things, things change with time. But my relationship continues, and likely will indefinitely, barring some unforeseen circumstance.
I can't say I am having sex every day or two, like I once did, but I feel lucky that we have stayed close over time in terms of level of desire, and the need to have sex. Like any couple, we have weathered a few storms along the way.
Changes have happened because of our growing together, our aging. Some changes are driven by societal changes in how sexuality is expressed these days. I may have a higher level of desire than my wife at times, but sexual thoughts and ideas are easier these days to at least see or read about, through the Net. This site is a great help. I enjoy good sex stories, and the chance to read and engage in interesting conversations on occasion. A lot of internet video content is artificial, formulaic, and boring, but sometimes there is an interesting plot twist; I haven't given up looking for good video content.
I sometimes feel a need for satisfaction not matched by my partner, and I imagine at different times she is more interested than me (and she has a small selection of toys). I don't mind taking things into my own hand, nor do I begrudge anyone else engaging in self-love. I would rather not cheat. I am not into the extra intrigue, or into hurting anyone else, including myself, by bringing about emotional distress or disease through a tryst or an affair. That lesson is sometimes learned the hard way, but I could also argue that an affair is not all bad.
Self-love is safe, and it should not be a substitute for a partner, but should instead supplement a healthy relationship. It is not keeping me from giving my best to my partner, and I would argue at times it is inspiring. I do take the time to give hugs, kisses, and sometimes just a lot of cuddling, with no intent nor concern if we do not have sex. There are may ways to make love, an intense expression of an intimate connection. It is more important to feel connected, and capable of sharing anything, even if there is not as much sex shared as there once was. It is important to remain best friends, and to not be too concerned when the sex is less frequent than it once was. It ends up being different, less frequent for us after the decades, but just as satisfying overall.
If the friendship is gone, and you are just roommates mostly going your separate ways, maybe it is time to consider alternate arrangements, and not feel too sad nor surprised if you end up splitting. I imagine splitting is hard to do, but then again a change may be just what is needed to feel refreshed and alive. There are three paths to solving any problem: fix it, live with it, or leave. Consider the pros and cons of each, and you may find the best path forward. Best wishes.
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than open one's mouth and remove all doubt" - Mark Twain (or Lincoln, or Confucius, or...)
I was. (Not any more.) For me I was unhappy & could care less if I ever had sex again. Once I had been divorced a loooong time & with a new man, turns out I am extremely sexual. More than he was & he was younger than me! I'm single & so wishing I wasn't! I think for me it was an unhappy marriage. For some the libido leaves with changes in life, stress, depression, etc.
I'm not in a totally sexless marriage, but because of my wife's orthopedic problems, it has been missionary and only missionary for years (yawn). She has lost some weight recently, she is
is 1x to 2x (depending on the store). Like an alcohol who hides booze, she hides cookies and other snacks. Don't recommend she get surgery, or counseling, we've already gone down that path.
I am not attracted to her sexually, but on the nonsexual side of things we get along with respect to money, what color to repaint the kitchen, and the other mundane things of life we get along. .
I have thought about divorcing her, but the financial cost is huge on the guy's end. Not only alimony, but loss of tax deductions (for the sake of the newly adult kids I let her keep the house) and I love the
house we share (just a few miles for work). If I moved I would have the expense of rent and longer commute and no tax deductions if she has the house and the kids. In short, I would be more than broke.
So I am lush looking for something besides what I get at home -- please don't judge unless you have been there yourself.
Sisters I know the frustrations you speak of. My husband is much older than I am and the first few years the sex was wonderful.
But the years have caught up with us and his health makes sex no longer possible. I know I will not have him too many more years, but I would take the same trip with him even if I knew where we would be today.
So I have continued to see others because no matter how much I love my husband, I could not go without sex on a regular basis.
Some mention going months or even years without sex. How do you do that? A few days is about my limit.
As we have aged our sex life has diminished, now it is about twice a month. I am 57, he is 58. Until about 2 years ago, it was still several times a week.
I have and thank goodness that is over.
