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Loathsome Toys

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Loathsome Toys

As we all know, nowadays sex-toys come in just about any shape, form and design.

Is there a specific type of toys that never did it for you? One that you deplore or have never seen the purpose of? One that initially appealed you but left you dissatisfied?

Maybe the Pocket Rocket that all your girlfriends kept venerating never did the trick for you; maybe you've never seen the point of vibrating dildos; maybe over-textured toys always weirded you out; maybe rabbit-vibrators were too much for you to handle; maybe you've never seen the appeal of anal-beads even though you enjoy anal.

You can discuss about popular toys that never really satisfied/interested you, or others that you find just plain weird.


Thanks for sharing!
Since no one seems to want to comment, I will give you my take on it. I have always for the most part liked simple toys like life like dildos, clit stimulating vibes, glass dildos etc. OK, I do love my Lelo toys but for the most part they are pretty straight forward in how they work to.

I have always been turned off to anything that has a wire attached to it, especially if you must plug it in. Something about electricity and my pussy that just don't seem to mix for me! LOL I also am not a fan of the first generation rabbit type vibes. there is just too much going on and they look like some sort of Ray Gun from a low budget 1950's Sci-fi movie. Big turn-off. Same goes for that tongue like wheel thing in your pics and anything that looks like it was part of some space creature with all its ticklers and warts! Again, Big turn-off.

And then there is the Hitachi Magic Wand. Everything I have heard about it is that it gives the most incredible orgasms. but when I look it at it is just so non-sexy looking. I know, what does it matter if it works! But the visual aspect is very important to me. When I look at the Hitachi, the first thing I think of is that Bam-Bam Rubble should be carrying it on his shoulder!! No thanks!

Hope this helps what ever it is you wanted to know. This is just one woman's opinion and I am sure I am in the minority on many of my thoughts!
I agree, for the most part. Lifelike or glass dildo, dp toys, bullet, etc are my faves. I agree with no wires and nothing ovey complicated. However-- I want a wand very badly! I just need to see if it feels as good as they say!!
I have the wand and it's not very sexy that's true but I really do like it, especially when combined with a few other toys. The only one that I've gotten that was useless was a lipstick vibrator. I thought I'd get something discrete for travel but it was way to tiny to have any impact so that was money wasted.
Quote by Nikki703
Since no one seems to want to comment, I will give you my take on it. I have always for the most part liked simple toys like life like dildos, clit stimulating vibes, glass dildos etc. OK, I do love my Lelo toys but for the most part they are pretty straight forward in how they work to.

I have always been turned off to anything that has a wire attached to it, especially if you must plug it in. Something about electricity and my pussy that just don't seem to mix for me! LOL I also am not a fan of the first generation rabbit type vibes. there is just too much going on and they look like some sort of Ray Gun from a low budget 1950's Sci-fi movie. Big turn-off. Same goes for that tongue like wheel thing in your pics and anything that looks like it was part of some space creature with all its ticklers and warts! Again, Big turn-off.

And then there is the Hitachi Magic Wand. Everything I have heard about it is that it gives the most incredible orgasms. but when I look it at it is just so non-sexy looking. I know, what does it matter if it works! But the visual aspect is very important to me. When I look at the Hitachi, the first thing I think of is that Bam-Bam Rubble should be carrying it on his shoulder!! No thanks!

Hope this helps what ever it is you wanted to know. This is just one woman's opinion and I am sure I am in the minority on many of my thoughts!


You're extremely similar to the majority of girls I've encountered through my life. Actually, what brought this question to my mind is a conversation I recently had with my girlfriend: she described the first generation of rabbit-vibrators exactly as you did in your post. She actually bought a pink one a few years ago because one of her friends recommended it to her, but she never got to appreciate it and eventually threw it in the garbage: the overall aspect simply weirded her out (flashy color, weird-looking rabbit, big, noisy, etc.), plus she didn't feel in control of her pleasure as much as with some of her other toys.

Most of the girls I knew were pretty similar to one another concerning the toys that they owned/used. Often times they simply relied on a simple clit stimulator (the Pocket Rocket being by far the most popular), one quality dildo, and 2-3 different conventional vibrators (often times they simply kept buying a new one until they found one that was satisfying/reliable enough). And then some of those who were into anal also had a few anal-beads and butt-plugs, although those are generally a bit less popular.

A lot of girls don't ask for much more than toys that are simple, reliable and pretty to look at. It makes me wonder who the hell could possibly be interested in all those weird-looking unconventional toys. Although admittedly, I did knew some girls who also enjoyed a few odd toys.
Yeah. That stupid vibrating egg, or bullet, or what it's called - never did it for me. The vibrations just aren't strong enough and it's just whimsical. Give me a massager any time, but not something that's powered by the same battery as my remote.

Also, I tend to stay away from any toy that simulates licking. Never tried them, but I just can't imagine them being anything like the real thing.

Aside from that: Cheap dildos. There's just no fun in them. They're loveless, fragile, and kinda cheap looking.

Also: Rabbit vibrators. Or stuff that twists and turns inside. I broke three of them within just a handful of uses (ha, handful, get it?) since my pussy apparently clamps down pretty hard when I cum, and that fucks up their mechanism or something. Kinda sad, because I liked the sensation, but I don't want to spend that money on toys all the time.

Nipple clamps - never used them. I'm fine without them and kinda paranoid that something might happen to my nipples, so I decide against it.

Double ended dildos - They might have seemed like a good idea at the time, but I never got into the right "rhythm" or whatever is required with a partner. So, it was too big a hassle to get any enjoyment out of. I'd rather have individual dildos for everyone.

Bananas. They're too soft, and kinda not that easy to lubricate. Bad choice for an impromptu toy.

Pencils, or anything small like that... well, they're just too small.

Pussy pumps... ah, never used them, but they seem kinda... I guess I have a similar feeling about them as I do with nipple clamps.

Ball gag. I loathe it. I want my partners to speak to me, and not shut them up.

Handcuffs, rope, anything to do with bondage... that's a sure fire way to turn me off. It just seems kinda one-sided and contrived. I understand a lot of girls get wet thinking about them, but this girl... not so much.

That's it, I guess.
Okay, for some reason I always thought that this toy was of very cheap quality ($5-10), but it actually seems pretty decent. The tongues are made of high-grade silicone and it costs around $40-60. This reviewer even gave it a score of 8.9/10: www.orgasm.com

It does seem potentially pleasurable, but yeah, it also seems to be rather noisy and inconvenient; cleaning it especially seems to be quite a hassle.

Skip to 1:40 to see it in action:


Quote by SereneProdigy
Okay, for some reason I always thought that this toy was of very cheap quality ($5-10), but it actually seems pretty decent. The tongues are made of high-grade silicone and it costs around $40-60. This reviewer even gave it a score of 8.9/10: www.orgasm.com

It does seem potentially pleasurable, but yeah, it also seems to be rather noisy and inconvenient; cleaning it especially seems to be quite a hassle.

Skip to 1:40 to see it in action:



This was the bigesst waste! A friend got it for me as a joke but when i tried it... horrible.... felt like nothing, cant press hard at all because the rotation is so weak. Dont bother!
Quote by SereneProdigy
Okay, for some reason I always thought that this toy was of very cheap quality ($5-10), but it actually seems pretty decent. The tongues are made of high-grade silicone and it costs around $40-60. This reviewer even gave it a score of 8.9/10: www.orgasm.com

It does seem potentially pleasurable, but yeah, it also seems to be rather noisy and inconvenient; cleaning it especially seems to be quite a hassle.

Skip to 1:40 to see it in action:



This was the bigesst waste! A friend got it for me as a joke but when i tried it... horrible.... felt like nothing, cant press hard at all because the rotation is so weak. Dont bother!