I totally disagree!
I prefer to see if a persons profile is interesting and has other socially redeeming qualities before I make contact or allow them to contact me.
Like most gals here, a guy with no avatar and just pics of his cock, will do nothing for me!
Take the time to chat a little but definitely have a completed profile filled out so that it tells the story about YOU!
Make your profile interesting so that we want to know more about you and actually be able to engage in a conversation!
We all are horney and want to fuck! But try to be more respectful and present yourself in an interesting light!
Steph
Are you talking about making friends on here, or in real life?
In real life, honestly, I am one of those girls. Im too embarrassingly shy to make the first move on a guy i think is hot, in case he thinks im desperate and/or says 'not with a 10 foot pole', so yes, i wait for them to make the first move. I dont agree it always works though, I've been single for 2 and a half years (with some offers i might add), so thats probably a sign i need to start sorting it out!
In response to the first reply (Steph), I don't think that my question was really understood...I am talking about passivity...this has nothing to do with looking at a person's profile and seeing if they are interesting or not and chatting.. I imagine that this is a normal approach for anyone! I hope that I don't need lessons in how to conduct myself but thank you for your opinions.
What I am talking about is actively going out and looking for interesting people rather than waiting for them to come to you. In both cases I assume people being respectful and engaging in conversation in order to get to know each other.
As Monroe states this is something that is equally applicable to real life as to lush.
For me, I do both...
If someone piques my interest, I have no problem in making contact.
Sometimes people will contact me first and a friendship will spring up that way...
I wouldn't say that I wait passively to be contacted though...
I think it's less gender-based and more to do with how outgoing someone is. While I agree that men are taught to be "the hunters" when it comes to proactively approaching women, a confident woman will have no problem with initiating things.
Personally, I don't play an aggressive game, but I will definitely signal interest (whether it's sex, relationship or friend based) and let things flow naturally from there. If there's someone that really catches my eye, I'm not going to hang in the background and passively leave things up to 'fate', waiting for him to notice/approach. But there's definitely a way to signal interest without being obnoxious or looking over-eager. After that, I'm not going to chase him though. I still expect for the guy (once he knows a woman is interested) to be the more dominant force, but that's just my preference in the type of guy I tend to like.
As far as Lush goes - it's a give and take with the guy (and girl) friends I've made here, but if someone is interesting/intriguing I'm pretty proactive. I don't like playing games. If I have something to say to someone, I'll say it.
I wait to be contacted i'm a little shy but i weigh out what their interest is and sort it out from there,if things work out we stay friends if not theres alway that saying,Well was nice meeting you but no thanks.
in real life i can be painfully shy when it comes to approaching a guy. i'm horrible at reading signals and have no idea when a guy is interested or just being friendly. i love when a man is bold and confident enough to approach me.
I am more passive with when it comes to friend requests. I usually wait for them to ask as I know how many unsolicited requests people get ( I know I get a lot) so I rather not be annoying. But if I see someone who seems interesting or like something about their profile, I will let them know. But I also respect what their profile says too. So if they do not want to chat with someone they dont know yet, I respect that and may try to get to know them in the forums.
Thank you wise ass for your point, you are correct in mentioning that my question is too vague and that is clearly what has led to the confusion.
However, my intention was simply to clarify my question as Steph clearly hadn't understood what I was getting at...this is not to say that it is her fault.
I don't understand the insinuation about me being disrespectful though, maybe blunt but my points are genuine and not intended to be laced with sarcasm as seems to have been perceived. Perhaps I could have put things better...?
I often find things can be misinterpreted when written down and we lose the visual side of communication and tone of voice....that in itself could be a whole new topic lol
Anyway, would like to set things straight and certainly don't intend to offend anyone so I apologise if I have.
At the risk of sounding like an adolescent hippy 'Make love not war' ;-)
I find that by basically refusing to socialize, with the exception of my extensive friend list, that I give the impression that I might actually be an 18yo bisexual female nymphomaniac pretending to be a guy.......errrrr
What was the original question again?
“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you."
sorry, posted in wrong forum, just too dumb to figure out how to delete the post
Okay Mr. Neversaynever let's look at it from a woman's perspective.
You go out for the evening and let's say that during the evening a number of horny guys come onto you. Make the maths easy lets say it's 10. Out of 10, 10 would be quite happy to fuck your brains out and probably wouldn't remember you name in the morning, have a condom on them or differenciate between you and the other 9 women they've tried it on with on the same night.
Faced with those odds can you possibly understand why a woman might filter out those 10 men and still go home without any of them?
I can of course understand, however the topic isn't about filtering or not, some guys actually filer too...its rather about being proactive or reactive...
Fuck that nincompoop, if I find someone intriguing while page browsing then I add them! I get tons of requests each day but I still go out and look at my options as well.
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