It's been almost two months since I gave birth, and I'm feeling great, already lost a little of the weight, and four nights ago, we decided to see how sex would be. Sadly, it was...not right. He was as gentle, caring and sweet as he's always been, and everything worked fine, but it just wasn't...good. I orgasmed, but it was so minor that I barely recognized it for what it was. We tried the next night, same thing, next night, same thing AGAIN. Is there something wrong with me? That I can't orgasm like I used to? Or does my body still need time to adjust? I can get wet fine, but the orgasm is just not like it used to be, and it's worrying me as we've never had any kind of sexual issue in ten years. I haven't said anything to him at all because it's nothing that he's doing wrong, it's all me. Any advice would be huge!!!
"A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere." - Groucho Marx
I'm not a mother, but I could wager a good guess that there's a number of reasons related to being a new mother, worry that getting to lost in the moment you might not hear the baby I've known some women with that issue. Not to mention your body is probably still trying to recover.
It is a new mother thing! Your body is still adjusting! You also have to remember your body changes after you have a LO so just keep that in mind and keep trying! GL
I'm not a mother, but I have a few friends that have been in this situation.
If you had a vaginal delivery, things get a little looser down there.
You need to do kegal exercises to 'tighten things up'. You can find out how to do it by googling 'kegal'. They are fairly easy to do, just clenching and unclenching, and you can do it anytime, anywhere. They will give you stronger orgasms.
That would be my first guess...
Otherwise, it might just be hormonal, and maybe you need a bit more time. Practice makes perfect!
Obviously, I'm not a mother! I have fathered 3 children, all three times this has happened. The length of time has always varied. The first two were normal vaginal births, the third, a c-section. A woman's body changes during delivery, the whole vaginal area is really stretched out. Hormones are also changing back to a normal state, as was before becoming pregnant. It is going to take some time to get back to that normal state. Doing those kegal exercises (they are just the same as if you are pinching off or holding back peeing) will help tremendously. If you still have questions, I would suggest you talk to your doctor/gynocologist/medical professional.
I hope this helps some, even though it is from a man's perspective.
I have 1 child, It took me almost six months to get back into the swing of things. My hubby was very patient and loving.
Take your time, I didn't have a real orgasm until I was playing with myself.
Stress of a new baby, unbalanced hormones and you need time to heal!!!! A little wine and a good vibrator might help too! Good luck.
Bunny12
Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off! I am a mother of two. Both recoveries were different (first one took way longer). My only offer of advice is one that my grandfather (yup!) told me. It took 9 months for baby to arrive - and you can not expect that your body returns to "normal" in any time shorter than that. Some women bounce back quicker - but at what cost?? Age is also a factor (if you are under 30 or over 38ish).
In specific response to resuming sex and orgasms - again, something amazing just occurred to your body that is very difficult.
Give yourself some love (literally) and time. Once the body has healed and resumed somewhat your new normal, you may find it all falls into place! Of course, practising helps as does time away from baby for a few hours of "us" time to let yourself completely relax and enjoy both yourself and your partner.
Good luck ....
Van
Also, remember all orgasms are great!
