I recently had sex with a women I've know for a long time and really care about, we've known we like each other and get along great. She became available and I made love to her in the manner in which that terminology applies it was sweet and passionate as the mood seemed to dictated. But while in the act I was running ideas through my mind of what I wanted to do. She behaved in a way which suggested to me a lack of sexual exploration. In the end I resited urges to do things conventional morality wold wrinkle its nose at. Things fell apart for other reasons but after reviewing the whole thing I asked myself the question, "When is it ok to let the freak out?" In the case of a women you intend on seeing as more than a fling, do you introduce what you're capable of slowly, or get filthy right away?
LOL, there are a lot of freaks here at Lush...self included. Before I joined the Lush site, I thought most of that was vanilla.
Somehow I almost feel, escalated!
This was the perfect thread to read, the first thing in the morning.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
I hadn't thought of the nominclature. I wasnt even approaching freaky I guess I was thiking upgraded basics. But in the manners of kink and freak it shouldnt be a surpise and I take that advice in the future. In terms of how "out there" a person could potentially get it seems like I should have gone a little farther if I wanted to standout from her more conservative past lovers?
Well, you want to stand out from her conservative past lovers, but you also don't want to push things too quickly or it could scare her away. As my earlier post said... take it all in stages.
A great little upgrade-trick that a lot guys overlook is the sex appeal of a dominant man in bed. Growl in her ear, get intense, make her feel like she is the hottest piece of ass that you've ever had (even if in reality she is frigid and a total butterface). Take control of the situation and don't be afraid to be a little rough. This doesn't mean that you should go 'cave-man' on her, but trust me... women often respond in an instinctively primal way to a man that knows how to exhibit dominant alpha energy.
Sure we love the gentle lovemaking, and we're ok with the frat-boy sex routine after we've had a bit to drink, but a man with a confident intensity that can take control will always have us purrring for more.
Shouldn't one move into the freaky sex zone slowly, unless they tell you right away to let the 'freak out!" Then just do it!
Bust loose withe the thick rusted chains, the iron shackles, and the branding iron.
Get into bed then shout shout let it all out!
you know if you brought the freak out the first night she might just bug out
can ya wait until perhaps ya both feel comfortable with each other
say after the passing gas phase
just think after one night you need to give her a few more sessions...first...
Hell just tie her up & keep her that way until she gets use to it...
Don't try it at home or in front of your other half.
Anecdotally (is that even a word?)...
There have been a time or two where I have successfully 'let the freak out' in real life (as opposed to cybering online or talking to people online who have the same freaky interests). I talked about it probably the second time we hung out after we already had sex. Basically, I asked her whether she had thought about threeways. She mentioned she had thought about two guys and a girl. I told her I was interested in that (and was wanting to do that, but didn't know a guy buddy who was into that) and told her I would help her fulfill her fantasy if she found someone.
But that wasn't what I had in mind originally. I asked her about a ffm threesome and she seemed to contemplate the idea. In fact, there was a hint of intrigue at first since she talked about messing around with girls. I talked about it with her at a later date (we were sleeping with each other over a period of time and that initial openness seemed to help things) and we talked through some scenarios. Originally, she was squeamish about licking a woman but we talked about just having me and the girl concentrate on pleasuring her and removing the requirement of having her interact with the girl. She seemed to be more agreeable to that scenario.
Things ended before we could try out what we talked about but I think Olivia is correct. Introducing things as you get to know each other better is the way to go. The other thing that seems to work, too, (as this is not the only time I've 'let the freak out') is by being open and pouncing early (like after the first time you sleep together). If you don't make it known you have some kind of freaky nature, she's going to make the assumption you don't, and two months down the line might be too late to reveal that handcuff/ballgag fetish.
For me, it totally depends on the guy and the situation. Sometimes there is an overwhelming sexual connection with someone and especially if it's more of a casual or fuckbuddy situation, I'm more likely to let the freak out earlier on.
When a man makes me feel sexy and desired, when he's kind and courteous and respectful, I'm more willing to push my sexuality beyond the norm. And more likely to enjoy it.
As long as there's an active level of trust and you've discussed each other's desires, why not give it a go?