i became very close with a girl from work to the point i developed feelings for her, we're both married and she doesn't feel the same way about me. things have been very distant between us and she want us to go back to the friendship we had. how do i give her what she wants without opening myself up to me hurt?
In my experience, you can't. Emotions just don't usually flip back that way. I'm curious as to why she is more of a concern to you than your marriage, though.
Big-haired Bitch/Personality Hire
In all honesty, as Delphi has said, you can't just turn off your emotions. She doesn't see you that way. And you've probably ruined your chance at even a friendship with her, to be honest.
Also, as Delphi has said, I'd really like to know why your feelings that she doesn't return mean more to you than your marriage.
░P░U░S░S░Y░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░O░
Meh, just roll with the changes, Paul. Ignore your married former dalliance and go back to the drawing board.
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Paul, I'm curious as to where this pops up in other aspects of your life. Sounds as if you sort of want the cake and eat it too. Is this a pattern for you? Wanting something before you're willing to release what you have? If you're in a relationship with a wife (kids?) work that one out first - stay, go, either way work it out first. Don't want to do that then you're doomed to keep going after the unrequited love, the job you almost got/wished you had, etc. But then again some people prefer that "drama" in their lives. Perhaps a talk with a counselor? Good luck.
I'm not convinced the feelings are unrequited love so much as unconsummated sexual lust. Love asks nothing in return. It's given freely, It can be shared, but makes no demands, has no expectations. Crushes, infatuations, even obsessions are not love, just desire. In my opinion, there's a HUGE difference between all these emotions.
tough love from the nunnery too
see what I suspect happened was you felt more for her than she did for you
and unlike you..she realized she was married
see you cant be married and be in love with someone else at the same time
you have to chose
and if you are still in love with her you need to let your wife go
see she deserves a man who ADORES her
not one who is just marking time as he waits for another to sweep him away
and you never ever do that at work
I mean two married people possibly having an affair
trust me...someone could lose their job
and for what..
something that doesn't even give you the safety of a promise
now after that tough little lecture
I feel for you
I truly do
it hurts and hurts for a long long time
so I suggest you get yourself to counseling
and find out what you are missing in your life
that you tried to find..in her
hugs
