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question for you please..

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What do you do when you get involved with someone married here and then they leave without a word or goodbye.

Sometimes they delete their account, sometimes they don't.


What do you do with the feelings and love you have for them?

(Not saying I loved all. )

Time gets me over them usually.

Am I just supposed to wonder what happened in heartbreak and then what do I do??

How do I move on?

I suppose I should stop looking for his name for who's online.
Olivia
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Quote by daddysweetheart
What do you do when you get involved with someone married here and then they leave without a word or goodbye.

Sometimes they delete their account, sometimes they don't.


What do you do with the feelings and love you have for them?

(Not saying I loved all. )

Time gets me over them usually.

Am I just supposed to wonder what happened in heartbreak and then what do I do??

How do I move on?

I suppose I should stop looking for his name for who's online.


Hello Margot,

In these situations, it's just best to accept things as they are.

For whatever reason, he's decided to make himself scarce. He may not have been as serious about your involvement as you were. Or maybe he felt guilty about being unfaithful to his wife. Unfortunately, because it's the internet it's easier to just fade away or leave abruptly without really having to answer or face up to your actions. These are facts we all know, but knowing these facts doesn't make it any easier to deal with the heartbreak left in someone's wake.

As far as the feelings you still have left, only time can deal with those. In the meantime, stay distracted. If you need to wallow, do so, but only for a short period of time. Get a hobby or two. Do things that make you feel productive but not destructive. Throw yourself into something you feel passionate about.

Also, stay out of new involvements/relationships for the time being. It's obvious you're still vulnerable and broken up about this. If you jump into something new, the person involved may be getting more than he bargained for which is always unfair. Jumping into a new romantic situation may also lead to your vulnerability being taken advantage of. Either situation could lead to further heartbreak, which will just worsen your current wounds.

And you're right, looking for his name online won't solve anything or make him come back. Even if he does come back, if he's not the one reaching out to you then you know where you stand. Even if his methods weren't the best, the message was clear: He wants things to be over, so let them be over.

Yours truly,
~Olivia
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Thank you Olivia...

This is very good advice.

Also, I may never get involved with another married man. ( not saying single men haven't done the same or couldn't.)

I am with someone I love very much now.

Thank you for your good advice, Olivia.


Hugs, Margot
dpw
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Quote by Olivia


Hello Margot,

In these situations, it's just best to accept things as they are.

For whatever reason, he's decided to make himself scarce. He may not have been as serious about your involvement as you were. Or maybe he felt guilty about being unfaithful to his wife. Unfortunately, because it's the internet it's easier to just fade away or leave abruptly without really having to answer or face up to your actions. These are facts we all know, but knowing these facts doesn't make it any easier to deal with the heartbreak left in someone's wake.

As far as the feelings you still have left, only time can deal with those. In the meantime, stay distracted. If you need to wallow, do so, but only for a short period of time. Get a hobby or two. Do things that make you feel productive but not destructive. Throw yourself into something you feel passionate about.

Also, stay out of new involvements/relationships for the time being. It's obvious you're still vulnerable and broken up about this. If you jump into something new, the person involved may be getting more than he bargained for which is always unfair. Jumping into a new romantic situation may also lead to your vulnerability being taken advantage of. Either situation could lead to further heartbreak, which will just worsen your current wounds.

And you're right, looking for his name online won't solve anything or make him come back. Even if he does come back, if he's not the one reaching out to you then you know where you stand. Even if his methods weren't the best, the message was clear: He wants things to be over, so let them be over.

Yours truly,
~Olivia

I can't believe that you didn't advise to stay clear of men who are attached, especially married men. Does being faithful not count for anything in your eyes?
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Nothing.
Olivia
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Quote by dpw

I can't believe that you didn't advise to stay clear of men who are attached, especially married men. Does being faithful not count for anything in your eyes?


I wasn't asked my opinion of extramarital affairs, so I didn't offer it.

I was asked how to deal with heartbreak.

I am here to offer advice on sex and relationships. I am not here to be the moral voice of what occurs between consenting adults.

~Olivia
RainyDaze
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Quote by dpw

I can't believe that you didn't advise to stay clear of men who are attached, especially married men. Does being faithful not count for anything in your eyes?


Most people on Lush claim to be indulging into their fantasies, maybe being with a married man is a continuation of such as fantasy.

Anyone can say they are single but have a family at home, there is nothing to dictate everyone must tell the truth and have full disclosure. I personally will tell you I am in a relationship if you choose to develop a relationship or have a conversation with me that is on your conscious not mine. I will protect anyone who talks to me if my boyfriend finds out, the blame will lie with me.

I have no issue talking suggestively or vulgarly to a married or involved man, I am involved as well.

My other half has no interest in my sexual curiosity why can't I explore them with a man/and or woman in a similar partnership
who will not engage.

Isn't the whole environment not based on reality, unless you take it there?