Dear Aunt Olivia,
I am eighteen and a female. I've been in a steady relationship for several months, but have had various sex partners. I ... have always been able to make myself orgasm from rubbing my clit but never by fingering myself or by penetration/toys.
Obviously, when I was younger this wasn't such a big deal. However, now that I have become increasingly sexually active, I'm wanting answers! I've been dying to experience what it feels like to orgasm during sex... Since, I never have. Don't get me wrong, it feels good, but it just doesn't feel like I am climaxing... Like when I rub my clit. My boyfriend understands and always does oral with me afterwards to get me off but I would love to be able to cum during sex from penetration alone!
Why haven't I and how can I? I don't understand... Is it just not possible for some girls??
Thanks...
Lauren
Edited to remove mention of underage activities.
-- Lush Staff.
lots of people have this...
so use your vibrator or digits as he does you
relax
sex is about pleasure
You're 18, there's plenty of time to see what the future brings.
For a long time I didn't cum during sex (other than anal), I'd get myself off afterwards while he laid next to me getting his breath back. In a four and a half year relationship I came during sex twice, once was after a particularly steamy chat with a friend on lush, so it didn't even have anything to do with my boyfriend! There were plenty of other orgasms but, like you, I wondered what was going on, especially as there were times when it would feel amazing and still nothing. Well, it turns out he just didn't do it for me. Since splitting up with him it's been a completely different story, now, instead of wondering if I will cum, I wonder how many times.
Relax, have fun and experiment, try different things with your boyfriend and see what happens.
i have the same problem but i have found that i can have an orgasm with my vibrator when having sex.... just get your partner to work with you and talk to them about it and do what feels good
You're probably not getting enough stimulation through penetration. It's probably safe to say that most women don't. The majority of the nerve endings are in the clit. If you get much closer to orgasm through foreplay before penetration, that might help, Also, if you don't want to stimulate your clit directly during intercourse, there are positions where the guy can do that for you while he continues thrusting at a pace that will keep him ready until you come.
I totally understand and it can be frustrating. I think what makes it worse for me is that I end up over thinking it, like "why haven't I cum yet?", which only makes it worse. I agree with the others that sometimes it is a matter of the person you are with and also the case that most girls don't cum through penetration.
H x
It's not always about the finish line. Sometimes the race is more enjoyable
I used to never have problems getting wet. Now I am in a monogamous seriosu relationship and I have issues getting wet. Ofcourse we do not do alot of foreplay, which could be part of the problem how do I get my guy to want longer foreplay where it is not always about sucking his cock?
