Can you still be a virgin if you use a condom?

8 Aug 2011

Hello Olivia and greetings from South East England. I have a question that you might like to give an opinion on. (And be gentle because up until last year I led a very sheltered life in a sexually dull marriage). Three weeks back I went bareback for the first time in my life (I told you I led a sheltered life). When I orgasmed she told me that I was finally no longer a virgin and that sex with a condom doesn't count. What do you think?

Koch. xx

Hi Koch,

I decided to move your question over to it's own thread so I can give a proper answer.

Don't be concerned that your lack of bareback experience means that you were overly sheltered or an odd duck. It just means that you were practicing safe sex, so kudos to you for that!

Sex is penetration (by definition) so you were not a virgin in the technical terms, regardless of whether your shaft was sheathed or not. I haven't heard of the "sex with a condom doesn't count" concept but I imagine it's been a useful strategy for men trying to convince girls that they can still be virgins as long as the experience involves a Trojan.

I'm not sure if your girlfriend meant the comment more in jest or if maybe the idea of being the first girl you really came inside made her feel special. When there is love involved, it's often a sweet thing to feel like you are getting to share something unique with your partner. This is probably the way she was thinking.

So, no... you weren't a virgin, but she was your first official creampie! That definitely counts for something! Enjoy... 3601

15 Aug 2011

Hi Olivia .....

Staying with this subject of "covered" penetration ~ if a man only has anal sex (saving the pussy for marriage), is he technically still a virgin?

dontknow

Thanks!!

PS - love this new forum! Love it!! drunken

15 Aug 2011

Quote by Olivia

I'm not sure if your girlfriend meant the comment more in jest or if maybe the idea of being the first girl you really came inside made her feel special.

It's because there is no actual physical contact because of the condom that in some people's minds it is not really sex...

I've heard this all before...

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories

15 Aug 2011

Quote by Yahtzee
Hi Olivia .....

Staying with this subject of "covered" penetration ~ if a man only has anal sex (saving the pussy for marriage), is he technically still a virgin?

Thanks!!

PS - love this new forum! Love it!!

Thanks Yahtzee, I'm glad you're enjoying it!

As for the question. I think people need to start looking at virginity as a state of mind rather than a medical technicality. To me, virginity involves penetration. In the case of gay men, it would be unfair to say that they are all virgins just because they may never have penetrated a vagina.

People can break things down by differentiating and saying they are anal virgins, or oral virgins, but I would question what the focus on the label "virgin" really means to them. If it's because of religious beliefs and young people are engaging in only certain kinds of sex, and it makes them feel better about it, then by all means ladies... call yourselves virgins even though you take it up the ass every weekend!

For women, as long as the hymen is intact they are medically considered virgins. But if you're engaging in every kind of sex act except vaginal intercourse... does it really matter? If the concern with maintaining virginity is about purity or intimacy with another person, then I think the jig is up.

At the end of the day it's just a subjective interpretation anyway.

Olivia xxx

15 Aug 2011

Quote by DirtyMartini
Quote by Olivia

I'm not sure if your girlfriend meant the comment more in jest or if maybe the idea of being the first girl you really came inside made her feel special.

It's because there is no actual physical contact because of the condom that in some people's minds it is not really sex...

I've heard this all before...

I think people give too much credibility to condoms as anything other than a preventer of STDs and pregnancy.

This is just another Clinton-esque strategy. Can we say "I didn't cheat on my spouse because technically there was no actual physical contact between the shaft of the penis and the vaginal walls?" I think not.

This is also a helpful hint to those that suspect their significant other is screwing around on them. If you do end up confronting them, you'd better break it down and ask details or they could easily lie and get off on a technicality.

I like this one:

"Did you insert your penis or tongue into any orifice of another human being, either with or without a condom or dental dam".

Note: Don't say "into any orifice of another woman"... if he's having a secret gay affair (which is more common than you'd like to think) then he can just say "No, honey" and still pass that lie detector!

16 Aug 2011

terrific viewpoint, Olivia. I agree!

17 Aug 2011

If you have sex and let the person penetrate then you lose you virginity whether its with or without a condom

20 Aug 2011

No because you have a human body part in you thats not yours also condoms break and what if it breaks and u could have a baby what are u going 2 say i didnt have sex no bobo it dont work like that

30 Aug 2011

If a girl falls from a tree there are chances she might loose her Virginity

Conclusion : Climbing tree can be very dangerous for Virginity

30 Aug 2011

Remember those parts down there your mom told you to cover up? Well if they are penetrated by someone elses covered parts (giver or receiver), party hat or not... You're Not A Virgin!

spank me hard please

12 May 2012

I have always considered "losing my virginity," the first time I would have sex without a condom. With a condom, it doesn't really feel "real..." because you are not offering all of yourself to your lover. It's a total different feeling without the condom, and in my opinion it least, that was when I lost my virginity. The only man I have ever had sex with (without a condom) was also the only man to ever cum inside of me and I will tell people that he is who I lost my virginity to. I don't regret it at all, in fact, it was the most perfect "first time" I could ever ask for!! I hope my answer and input helped you out a bit... Good luck. smile

16 Jul 2012

Quote by heartoftheweb
Remember those parts down there your mom told you to cover up? Well if they are penetrated by someone elses covered parts (giver or receiver), party hat or not... You're Not A Virgin!

clear, simple and interesting ... Fugly

2 Oct 2012

Just to throw more wrenches into the works, is a girl (or boy for that matter) still a virgin if they let another person penetrate (vaginally or anally) them with fingers, or some other object? What about if they do it themselves? For the record, I would say the first example would be no, they are no longer virgins, while the second case they still are. The involvement of a second person being the difference. It is certainly considered a crime if someone is penetrated anywhere with anything or touched in a sexual manner against their will by another person.

There is also the issue of just oral sex. Is a girl just having her clit licked (no penetration anywhere with anything) make her no longer a virgin? Does the same apply to a guy just getting a blowjob? What if he just gets a hand job from someone else?

Also, Olivia wrote "For women, as long as the hymen is intact they are medically considered virgins." There are reasons girls have there hymens broken other than sex. In my case I lost mine surgically when I was 3 years old due to a medical problem. Did that make me no longer a virgin at 3?