"My abilities are growing. I can see more shapes now. Physical forms of entities that have since passed on. I can sense when that most are just desperately seeking help but some have other intentions. Much darker ones. And they are the ones that seem to come to me most often. In my dreams, those demons are much more clear. Their snarling faces, tattered clothes, and haunting appearance all become lucid when I enter the dr...

March 13th, Dear Diary,  Well, today was shit. Nothing new there.  My work day was overloaded - like usual, I dropped my coffee and stained my shirt, ripped a stocking and the guy I've been trying to be semi-serious with is only interested in having a lay. Now, after being unable to decompress on my own, I'm sitting here on my couch with a bottle of Chardonnay and my largest - and favorite of late - wine glass while I try...

March 19th, Dear Diary,I've begun to lack empathy. Especially for the men that I toss myself between. I give no sympathy for their plights against hurting me. I hear their complaints and reservations, their pleading voices begging to show me something more, but I do not listen. Their instructions are always the same - do as I say, or get out.Some of them walk out with the intention of never returning, but most of them don...

The second person stood directly in front of the hole, blocking my sight and creating more frustration for me. What. The. Hell? My confidence diminished as I contemplated having to deal with two men at the same time. If it actually was another man, that is.I hadn't even had experience with one man so I didn’t think there was any possibility of taking them both on. But, right now, I had no idea what was going to happen. I...

January 17th,  Dear Diary,I've had to let Darcy go.As much as I hate it, I wasn't getting any better with her. I could tell she resented me for the pain I caused. I deserved all of it, of course. But I couldn't take the thought of keeping her caged in unhappiness when she deserved to be someone's one and only. To be someone's dearest love and not just my "second choice."  After I succumbed to my foolish weaknesses, our re...

“Hope you’ve done as I asked or you won’t get your surprise,” John said with a smirk as he gripped the steering wheel a little tighter.I was sitting in the passenger seat with my legs and arms crossed, pretending to ignore him as I looked out the window, watching the traffic slowly move by.“Are you going to even give me a hint of what this surprise of yours is?” I finally huffed.“It’s wet,” he said with a devious smile.My...

"Don't be a baby," Jess scolded."We've all done it. It's kinda fun, actually," Annie coaxed."They can't see you,” Taryn added, “and it's a quick way to earn fifty bucks.”I don't know how my friends coerced me into doing it, but there I was inside the women's locker room at a run-down gym, about to offer my services to men on the other side of a wall in exchange for money."Yeah, yeah, yeah… I get it. Now, where is this hol...

August 28th,Dear Diary,  It's been a long while and much has happened since my last entry. During my months away, I did many foolish things with a man I now wish I had never met. Where love once blossomed, flames of hatred are now fanned so hot that I can feel them burning those who do love me. Especially Darci. She knows how defiled and violated I feel, since I couldn't bear the thought of hiding the truth from her. I've...

I was at my easel, failing yet again to create something beautiful when I heard a knock at my front door. I looked at the clock and my eyes popped wide open: it was four o'clock and I realized that it must be my buyer standing outside my apartment. Panic set in. I slammed my paint brush down onto the table and called out, "Just one moment,” as I rushed to the kitchen. I dampened a paper towel with water and tried to wipe...

There's something in your smile that makes it all alright, There's a comfort in your laugh that helps me sleep at night,Something in your voice that gets me through the day. A light in your eye that keeps the darkness at bay. You are, most certainly, the sunshine in my sky,And I can't explain my love for you so I'm not even going to try.You are simply someone that I cannot live without,You are what makes me happy, it's yo...

I wish I'd never met you,I wish you weren't still here. I wish I didn't have these thoughts,I wish you'd disappear.I try to toughen up,And pretend like I don't care.But the truth is, I still think of you,In my mind, you're always there.How do I go on like this? Wondering like I do, Do you think of me at all? Do you miss me, as much as I miss you? My body still reacts,In a salacious and filthy way. And I find my hands roam...

Dear Diary, We are beginning to talk less and less now, it seems. My heart still yearns for his attention and I still find myself wishing things were different. My thoughts still gravitate towards him and they flood my mind every time I get a moment alone. I still continue to dream of him at night but recently my dreams have become more of nightmares where he is involved. I have also begun to notice that I can be more eas...

Morgan awoke to a cold bed and fear in her heart. Having opened her eyes, she jolted upright and looked around the room. Christian was nowhere to be seen. He’d left. He had fucked her and he’d left her.Excruciating pain welled up inside her chest and tears filled her eyes. She pulled up the blanket to cover her naked body, feeling ashamed, stupid, and dirty, despite having anticipated that this could happen. Intense pain...

Feburary 24thDear Diary,A few more weeks have passed and I’m still not feeling very cheerful. I know that I promised a more pleasant entry so I will try to keep that promise.I’m still missing him in more ways than I can say. We talk now, more frequently, like we used to. That alone fills me with a joy so great that there are few words I can find to properly express it. I get lost in the bliss of hearing his voice and ever...

February 19thI woke up to the sun shining through the hotel room windows. I pried open my eyes and blinked against the light. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 9:13 am. That means it was just after 4:00 am in America. Can't call Mom and Dad, yet. I thought to myself. I sat up, moved the covers and swung my legs over the side of the bed. Today was going to be a good day and I felt hopeful. My mind immediately began...