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Lisa
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female
Australia
Forum
Moderator
Quote by whysoseriousj
Please comment what turns you on about profiles if you feel creative, if not, the poll is a sufficient benchmarking tool...
I don't have anything against them in general but you're better off making an album and leading up to it with some teasing shots first that don't show everything. If you use one of those photos as the album cover pic it gives people the option of clicking if they want to see more, rather than seeing it all straight away.
Moderator
Quote by mattguize
So yeah, I just wondered if any one has any hints / suggestions / methods that they've found useful in writing conversations?
In addition to the advice already given, you can read your conversation aloud (just the actual dialogue, no dialogue tags or actions) as you're writing the scene to see whether it sounds natural and flows as a real conversation would. Use contractions such as "don't", "shouldn't" etc rather than "do not" and "should not". Try to write as people actually speak rather than using more formal words.
Another idea for giving it a natural feel is to have your characters doing something while they're talking. If they're having coffee together, show them pausing to stir in sugar, take a sip etc. Give them actions to break up the dialogue and keep the scene moving. Actions also help show what the character is feeling, so it doesn't all need to be spoken aloud.
Good luck with your writing!
Moderator
I have one tattoo. It's only small and it's on my ankle. I got it when I was twenty-six so I can't even say it was a bad decision I made when I was a teen. I don't love it or hate it but if I could remove it easily without going through the pain and expense I'd get it removed.
Moderator
Quote by eroticascribe
Hang on, now I'm confused. Slipperywhenwet2012 says quote, "No. There should be no mention of naked persons under the age of 16."
Liz's reference to children contradicts that. Bottom line: "Children may be included as characters in a story only if all the above stipulations are met."
So then I read that as saying I can make reference to my daughter 14, My naked daughter stood before me. "What time are leaving Dad, I have to get dressed."
or words to that effect. No sexual reference here. I don't see that as improper, or violating the T&C. Comments please
I agree with Shylass.
All you need to do in order for your story to pass is raise your character's age by two years. You might not be referring to her in a sexual way but since she won't be involved in the sexual part of the story and that particular moment doesn't progress the plot, it comes across as if the image is thrown in there to arouse, even if that's not your intention.
Moderator
Sometimes I take a break from writing stories that are giving me trouble but I don't abandon them completely. The first part of a story I posted a few months back was written six years ago, so it was a long break, but I eventually came back to it. I've never deleted a half-finished story. Everything gets saved.
Moderator
Quote by Dancing_Doll
http://www.lushstories.com/lisa
I recommend Lisa's profile. She keeps a low profile on Lush, but don't let that dissuade you from checking out her incredible collection of erotica. She is easily one of THE BEST writers on the site. Her characters are sexy, sensual and believable, and she is a master of natural dialogue and real intimacy.
Aside from her stories, she has an album of some of the hottest drool-worthy collection of men on her profile and plenty of other delicious pics.
Check her out!
I don't know how I missed this post. I'm late with my thanks, but thank you, Ashleigh! (And Liz!)
That's really an impressive effort given just how many sites are out there.
Moderator
Quote by Regmister
There is this girl I have really liked for 6 years now but she got married in the mean time but seems like she and her husband, a friend of mine, are losing interest in each other because they don't go out together as much as they used to and when they do they are at seperate ends of the bar.
This can often mean the complete opposite of what you think it means. When couples trust each other and feel comfortable together they often don't feel the need to spend every minute in each other's company. There's a chance you're reading more into it than is actually there because it suits your fantasy. You're honestly better off leaving it as a fantasy, no matter how much you want it to be different.
Moderator
Quote by 1ball
Can that possibly be any squishier? I wrote a story within the guidelines and it seemed to me the guidelines were ignored and the story was excluded. There was no non-consensual sex. The only consensual sex for that character, after being 'taken' prior to giving consent and then given the freedom to leave, was masturbation by the character. She was undressed but also unmolested. I can't speak for other writers, but I'm not going to get my stories blessed before they're written. I'm going to try to write to the guidelines, but I'm not going to write boring crap just because a guideline might be ignored and a story might arbitrarily be excluded because it got too close to the edge.
Your story started off with your main character waking up naked in an unfamiliar room after being drugged against her knowledge, then it changed to her waking in the room naked after being hypnotised. To me both of these scenarios were against site guidelines. We were discussing this via PM then you ended up posting your revised story, which met the guidelines. I mistakenly assumed you were okay with everything. If you weren't I would have been more than happy to continue discussing it with you via PM.
Moderator
Quote by Quenton2123
I feel like some folks may have missed my point. I wasn't trying to say male authors are bad, or that I refuse to read stories written by them. I was saying that I have a preference towards female authored stories and was curious if others also held preferences of their own.
I enjoy well-written erotica regardless of who the author is but for me reading an erotic story written by a man just adds an extra level of sexiness to an already enjoyable story.
Moderator
Quote by jakehatteras
How many of your real life friends know you are on Lush and do you know those who are on Lush?
My husband's the only one from my real life who knows I'm a member here. I don't talk to my friends about any of the websites I visit. Internet usage doesn't generally come up in conversations.
Moderator
Quote by PandoraBox
Im lost i dont know what else to do have had several people read it and they cant figure it out ethier...
I know it can be a frustrating process, but the moderators who've processed your story have given specific advice regarding what needs to be done. I pointed out the problems in my last notice to you and also provided examples to show you what was needed. Other moderators have done the same thing.
The main problem is past/present tense. You switch back and forth between the two, often in the middle of a sentence. You just need to choose one tense and use it for your entire story. Eg: I stand or I say, I stood or I said. This means changing all your verbs so they read in the same tense.
The other area that needs attention is punctuation, mainly in your dialogue. Links have been attached to the rejection notices pointing you in the direction of some resources that will help you.
Here's the one for dialogue:
http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst27829_Formatting-Dialogue.aspx
You can also find some excellent writing advice here:
http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_topics33_Morgan-Hawkes-writing-tips-and-advice.aspx
And some more here:
http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_topics32_Essential-Reading.aspx
Moderator
Quote by slipperywhenwet2012
It doesn't work that way. Once a monogamous person cheats, then by definition, they are no longer monogamous. How many times does a person have to lie to be a liar? Or steal to be a thief? I applaud people who bounce back and work things out after being cheated on, but in my experience and from what I've seen, a lot of "moving on" constitutes sweeping it under the rug. Or doing your best to make like it never happened. But it's always there lingering on the surface.
That's kind of what I'm getting at. My point is that people are capable of change, whether it's in a negative way or a positive way. Just because a person has been monogamous at one point doesn't mean they'll always be monogamous. Just because a person has cheated once doesn't mean they'll cheat in every relationship from then on. People are capable of growth and change. Not always in a good way.
Moderator
Quote by Magical_felix
Hmm.. I don't think that is one of the cases where you can try to see the flip side and say it must be true as well. That would mean a cheater is back to being faithful again in the period in between they cheat again. Every friend that I have who is a cheater cheats and cheats again no matter how many times they are caught. You will find cheaters have an incredible superficial charm to them and some people just fall for it. I have been with married women and I'm telling you.. There are these moments where I am observing them and I swear... They could probably be capable of murder if they think they could get away with it.
That's a bit scary!
I didn't mean it that way exactly. I'm referring more to people who've been faithful to their partner for years and somewhere along the way something changes in their relationship that results in them cheating rather than talking about the problems with their partner. If they're capable of being faithful at one point I believe they're capable of it again.
I get the impression that the people you're referring to see cheating as a thrill. They don't seem suited to relationships in the first place.
Moderator
Quote by DandR4ever
can a couple rekindle after both were caught cheating???
If they both want to reconnect and they're committed to fixing the problems in their relationship, I don't see why it can't work with some effort.
If "once a cheater, always a cheater" was true and people really weren't capable of change, then "once a monogamous person, always a monogamous person" should also be true. If a person was faithful at one point, they can be again. (If they want to be.)
Moderator
Quote by faady
Would you like to go out on a date with good guy, who opens door for you and do other nice things to make you feel special.
Or you prefer bad guys with "i dont give a F**k" attitude and kind of a abusive behavior.
I'm just happy with a man who falls somewhere in between those two examples. The idea of a man falling all over himself to try to impress me would make me feel like he thinks he's not worthy, and an abusive man isn't appealing in any way either.
A decent, confident man who treats people in general well (rather than just being overly nice to women he finds attractive) is the type of man who appeals to me most.
